Everybody's Doing It

Suffer like you mean it.

2012-01-22T19:50:00.000-08:00

1 Peter 3:13-5:11

There’s a line from one of my favorite TV shows that I’ve loved for a long time. While walking through a slum, and seeing the general sense of hopelessness that the poor and destitute are forced to live with, one character, Dr. Franklin, turns to the other and comments on how unfair it is that people should have to endure this kind of hardship. The second character, named Marcus, hardly missing a beat, responds by saying: “I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'wouldn't it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?' So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe.”

Life’s not fair. There is probably not a day that goes by where something doesn’t happen that disrupts our plans, or inconveniences us, or even destroys something precious to us, or hurts us deeply. Of course, everyone would concede this point in conversation. When asked, pretty much everybody would say “Of course life’s not fair. That’s just the way it is.” But there’s a tone, or a subtle expression – an inference in the way they speak the words; people say life isn’t fair, but I can almost always feel them whispering ‘but it should be’.

We can speak the words and understand that the pains and troubles and hardships of life come to us as part of the natural course of existence, but if we are truly honest, would we admit that we continue to feel something of a sense of injustice about what we are forced to go through? Enduring the pain of rejection, of abuse, of loss, not because of anything we’ve done, just because.

Well, I know I certainly do. I very easily slip into that pattern of thinking, whereby I react as though I am owed good fortune in some way. But the words of Marcus are words of wisdom – taking comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe. Bad luck just sort of floats around, and it has to land on someone. It’s best to know that it doesn’t happen because we deserve it, it just happens.

But here’s the irony: we do deserve it. We understand, as followers of Jesus, that in the condition of sin, and turning our backs on God, we deserve a punishment. I want to be clear with this: I am not saying that bad things happen to us because we do something that merits a punishment; I still hold to the adage that life is not fair, and bad things happen…just because. I simply want to emphasise the irony of the fact that although we do not suffer because we deserve it, we do deserve the suffering, and more.

And this is where we really begin to understand just how unfair life…how unfair God, truly is. (ch 3:18-22)

God’s not fair – if God were fair, we could stand assured that all the devastation heaped upon us in our lives was well and truly because we deserved it. God’s not fair – He doesn’t give us what we deserve; He gives us grace instead. What we do not deserve – the life found in Jesus, forgiveness, the indwelling of the Holy Spirit – He gives us in outrageous proportions. God is not fair.

In the first week of this series on 1 Peter, Tim spoke of how we are encouraged to cope with our trials in this life: By behind us, to what Christ has done for us; by looking upward, to our Father who is greater than our trouble; and by looking ahead, to the promise of eternity in God’s presence. It is to this idea that Peter returns in his letter to the Christians throughout the outer empire. He does not want his readers to expend their energy and emotion on being troubled by the unfair persecution they are experiencing. Fix your eyes instead, he says, on the One who has suffered for you, the One who presently makes good of your suffering, the One who will bring it all to an end.

Peter’s message now links with his theme of submission, which we learned about last week, and an overall encouragement for followers of Jesus to remain humble. Peter called his readers, and we as Christians today, to submit to the authorities in this world, wherever we encounter them. This is to be a genuine willingness to obey instruction that comes from those in authority, even when we might disagree. Of course this doesn’t mean we should obey instruction that is in conflict with the teaching of our Lord – Peter himself was the one who stood before his religious leaders and refused their order to stop preaching the gospel; “Judge for yourselves whether it is right in God’s sight to obey men rather than God.” Peter gave example of slaves, instructing them to submit willingly to their masters, even when those masters are harsh. Even when they dish out beatings without cause. Even when they treat you like scum.

It is in humility that our sufferings become a means by which God can work in the hearts of those who see us.

My best friend and old roommate is not a Christian, though he spent many years growing up in church with his family. He enjoyed the singing and music; he liked going to youth group and playing games; he was even occasionally challenged and impressed by a sermon. But as he began to drift further away, he once confided in me, he noticed that Christians are really no different to anyone else – at least not the ones he was meeting. When things became hard, when life turned messy and painful, they would fall apart and wail about how unfair it is. Al said he could go to work and see people respond like that. He could go to a shopping center and see people respond like that. What was the point in all this faith if it did nothing to help?

(ch. 3:11-16) As we endure our hardship now, our response is testimony to those watching us: does God make a difference or not? Peter reminds us of this, so that we might rejoice even more in our pain. The things of this world that cause us grief are not what we should really care about anyway. These things will be over and done when Jesus returns – Peter reminds us of this also (ch. 4:7).

People are watching – don’t make them regret it. Don’t give them reason to doubt the words we speak about our God of love, our Prince of peace, our Spirit of power.

Peter’s sympathies are with those who are suffering. He is not callous and ignorant of the distress they feel – he simply has a perspective that makes everything worthwhile: The perspective of eternity.

This becomes especially poignant when the suffering that occurs is expressly because of the faith of the individual. When someone is insulted or excluded or harmed because they are a Christian, that is when there is something worthwhile going on. (ch. 4:12-16) It seems again to be an irony, that this is the kind of suffering to which Christians, in general, appear to be the most opposed.

I’m aware, as a preacher, that it’s quite possible to say some things from the pulpit that can easily cause offense. It is never intended, but it is a reality. It is difficult to craft sermons well, because preaching goes out to a general audience, and so one has to relate the general message. But there’s no such thing as a general person – everyone is a complete and unique individual, with our own experiences and our own trials. I find speaking one-on-one so much easier because I can always speak directly to whatever the needs of that person may be at that time.

Still, there’s value in hearing messages intended for an audience other than one’s self.

I know that there are many Christians who certainly do encounter persecution and hardship as a direct result of their faith. There are some among us in this very community. It can range from annoying – as most high schoolers of faith would be happy to tell you – all the way to heartbreaking – as those, generally a little older, who have seen relationships break because their faith, could share. Sometimes people hurt you unintentionally, because they have issues with the idea of religion and are slow to reconcile that with their friendship to a Christian. Sometimes it’s very intentional, when a bully simply wants to make someone feel excluded, or intimidated, or ridiculous, and challenges with questions that they’re not really interested in having answered.

To those of you who experience this as a matter of course in your day-to-day, or possibly have begun to endure some of it, and there is even worse yet to come, take these words as your comfort. (ch. 4:14) God is with you, feeling the hurt as you do, and giving you strength to carry on. Better still, how you respond to those who persecute you gives God a path into those people’s hearts and minds. I like to imagine God in those kind of minds, like a song that gets stuck in their head and they can’t keep going over and over: “Why are they so cool about it when I trash Jesus?!”

There are, I believe, a greater number of Christians in the West who don’t endure this kind of trouble. We used to, at school, in the early days of our faith or in unfamiliar social circumstances. But those times are often past.

Perhaps it was the constant experience of it that led us to instinctively avoid getting into those situations. I don’t believe any of us intentionally run away from those who would mock our faith, but think hard: when was the last time you were actually insulted? Not when was the last time you met someone who didn’t believe, and you had a civilized conversation that ended with a smile and a handshake; not when was the last time you were told by someone that they ‘don’t believe in that silly nonsense’, and that was the end of the conversation.

When was the last time your faith in Jesus was the reason someone insulted you, or excluded you, or set out to make you feel bad?

I’m not suggesting that we need to run out and pick a fight with an atheist so that we can feel assured we are living more for Jesus; I just want us to consider why we don’t have this kind of trouble in our own lives anymore. Is it because God has not taken us into those kinds of situations for some time, and has filled our lives with different kinds of opportunities? Is it because our lives are full and our routines settled, so that we don’t really meet new people anymore? Is it because, when we meet new people, we guard what we say so carefully, as to not cause offense, that we completely gloss over the point of telling them that we are followers of Jesus?

(ch. 5:6-11)

Disciple-ined

2011-11-08T16:04:00.000-08:00

At New Year’s I decided to make a different and fairly radical resolution, at least for myself. I determined that every month this year I would introduce two new disciplines into my life: One spiritual, one physical. I had a sense that such disciplines were really the next step in my growth as a Christian, and in order to know God more, I needed to start dedicating myself more, and using my time more wisely.
Well, I managed four months – which is comparatively good for me, but given that I was out to make a significant change in my lifestyle, I’d say at this point that I missed the boat. Actually it’s more like I walked up to where the boat was moored and considered getting on, and while I was considering I watched it start to sail slowly away.

Discipline and I have never been the best of friends. I was never too fond of him, because usually we would meet at the place where my Dad’s hand connected with my butt. I took a shot at learning karate for a couple of years, but the discipline required to really get somewhere with it seriously cut down on the time I usually dedicated to playing. I suppose one could say that when it came to play, or reading, or watching TV, I demonstrated considerable discipline – in being able to completely ignore anything or anyone that would try to distract me to another task such as homework or cleaning my room.

I think for most people discipline is that force which we all acknowledge is needed and valuable and we encourage people to employ it – we just hope that we don’t have to deal with it ourselves too much. That’s me, at least, and I can certainly say that having a lax sense of discipline was not really of benefit to me when I started working. I suddenly found I couldn’t sleep in whenever I wanted; I couldn’t go out whenever I wanted; I couldn’t look however I wanted – I suddenly had new standards to which I had to conform. If I didn’t, I was going to lose jobs. I learned discipline as a necessity for making it in the world, which is how most of us would understand it.

We don’t always learn the same for our faith.

Paul considers discipline to be an indispensible part of church life; and Paul’s not just talking about personal discipline in prayer and bible reading now either; Paul’s talking about participating and being disciplined within a community.
I wonder what the response might be if Tim began issuing detentions for being late or absent on Sundays. Can you imagine writing lines on the board for getting the lyrics wrong when we sing? What might merit corporal punishment as discipline? Spilling communion? Falling asleep during a sermon?
Paul’s not quite about to bring out the cane on the Thessalonians – I think the example of God’s Word shows that God is really very slow to punish. But Paul leaves us with no doubt that we are called to a new standard as Christians – and to really embrace the life for which God has created us, and for which Jesus redeemed us, it’s going to take discipline.

See, with all the confusion in the Thessalonian church about the return of Christ, there had been a growing problem amongst the congregation. There was a group of the believers who said “Jesus is coming back any day now. There’s hardly any point in getting anything started. Time to sit back, chill, and wait for him to snatch us up to heaven. Pass me a beer.”
Now, I think it’s important to point out that these guys had a point. If Jesus was returning ‘any day now’, and intended to pick up the Christians to live in a five star resort, then it would be pointless to start any meaningful work projects or to make any long-term plans. Best to just spend our last minutes grabbing random people off the street and giving them the gospel as quickly as we can to maximise the chance of filling up that resorts accommodations.
Of course, there’s a problem here – these guys were not living as God intended for them to be living. They had sacrificed discipline, expecting that their pay-off was right around the corner.

Paul had set an example for the Thessalonians when he had been there with them: (vs. 7-10). Remember that Paul had started by admonishing the Thessalonians for their faith, and the works that their faith was producing. He did this because the works of the church are an integral part of the redeeming work of Jesus in this world, and his return to completely realise the Kingdom of God. The church has work to do; that work takes place in this world; it takes place within the context not only of church communities, but of town and suburb and city communities. That work involves manual labor to build homes, to help people move, to cook meals, to balance finances, to provide legal representation, to make sure the plumbing works. A verse which I came across long ago, and have really tried to live by ever since, is Colossians 3:23: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart as though working for the Lord, not for men.”
Our work honors and brings glory to our God. Our work done well tells the world of our character, and of God’s use for us. Our work helps to usher in God’s kingdom – not yet fully realised, but bit by bit he is on his way.

What then to do with those who refuse to get involved in this work? I think too that Paul would ask the church these days, what to do with those who ignore the work of the Kingdom in favour of their own selfish pursuits? Because I hardly think that anyone in the church in this day and age could be accused of laziness. Maybe there are some, but by and large everyone is really, very busy, all the time. What I think has happened over the past hundred years or so is that we’ve exchanged our commitment to God’s work by elevating the importance of our own. Our business today threatens to keep us from even attending church, let alone being involved in any meaningful work as a part of the community.
How do we turn this around? How do we address this idolatry of the personal kingdom of our careers, our families, our dream homes, our committees?

Paul has an answer for us, although I’m not sure how well received this would be if we truly wanted to give this a try. (vs. 6). (vs. 14-15).
Paul isn’t talking about kicking anybody out of church. That was a disciplinary act that could only ever have been used with great reluctance. That kind of measure indicated that the individual was, quite simply, not a believer, and had no place in the fellowship of believers. That’s not what Paul is talking about here, because his desire is to see men and women not shut out from the community of God, but pushed to fulfil their responsibilities as a part of that community.
In saying “Do not associate with them” he is suggesting that the faithful in the church remain somewhat aloof. We don’t spend great deals of time with these people; we don’t have them around for dinner; we don’t invite them to next weeks home group. We see them and say hello and ask how they are doing on Sundays, but we have to make it clear that their behaviour, their neglect of the call of God’s kingdom, means that we can’t have intimate fellowship with them. They are not enemies, indeed we should still consider them to be family, but they need to embrace their own role in that family. Paul hopes that the desire to be intimately involved with the community will be the catalyst for change.

Paul highlights, at the end of this letter, that he is, in fact , the one writing it. He reminds the Thessalonians that he has a unique mark, so that they will not be fooled into thinking that the letter came from someone else. (vs. 17) Paul does this to remind the church that his authority is not anything to do with himself – his words are not his own. Paul speaks the Word of God to his people, only as he is empowered by God’s Spirit to do so. God’s Word is everything to this man – he opens this chapter by asking the church to pray that the word of God would continue to spread. (vs. 1-3)
When Paul speaks these words, and calls the church to behave and act responsibly, and calls God’s people to exercise discipline in their work, and calls us to discipline one another, he is not just giving a good suggestion, he is speaking God’s commands to us.

Are we capable of challenging one another? Can we hold each other accountable? I’m asking this church, this community of St Johns: Would we discipline those among us who are not fulfilling their responsibilities? Would we call one another to account for the way we live our faith?
I will be the first to admit that the idea does not sit comfortably with me – I don’t like the idea of causing other people offense, particularly if I have to see them every week. But if the alternative is a church that is slowly, bit by bit, working less for God and more for ourselves, then I’ll eat alone if I have to.

Not Working is Hard Work

2011-10-31T22:17:00.000-07:00

"Remember me with favor, O my God"

That is becoming my prayer, as I enter into year 3 of ministry in Small Country Town VIC.

Two years ago today I stood before a congregation of strangers - with a few familiar faces - and was prayed for, welcomed and received into their community. They said to me "Here's some young people, there's a school, this is what we've got...do what you can." After the time that has passed, the opportunites I have been given, the efforts we have made and the experiments that have been tried, I can state one thing with utter conviction:

I can't do very much.

Oh sure, I can make a good show of it. I get really busy with my week, spending a day at the high school, spending a day studying, pulling together a number of programs for young people, doing services on Sunday's. I can exhaust myself easily with all the stuff that I do.
And it really doesn't amount to much in the end.
Y'know, I can recall an occasion when I was still in ministry with El Firo, and at a leaders ministry meeting he decided to pray for all of us, one by one. And he got to me and asked "Well Lindz, what do you want us to ask God for you?" And I said, "Humility." And everyone's eyes went wide and the four people standing closest to me took a huge step back. I was confused about that at the time. I'm not anymore.

Humility kind of sucks. Because, in much the same way as God works when you ask for patience, you don't just get it, or even develop it, and then never have to worry about it again. It has to become a state of being, else it means nothing. When you pray for God to grant humility, he will keep you humble for a long, long time.

What does this mean for me? Well, in two years I have watched the slow increase of a girls ministry, seen a dozen young people ask Jesus into their lives, and four of them have been baptised. Men and women have grown in strength to lead and encourage and mentor those younger than themselves, and people have been stretched into areas they weren't sure they would be able to cope with.
And I can't take credit for any of it.

I really can't, because the stuff that I work so hard at, that drains me so much and occupies time, is not what young people remember when I ask them why they want to make the choice to follow Jesus. It really does feel as though God is at work in spite of myself. Though I know that's not the truth.

Psalm 127:1 says "Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labour in vain." And it's the truth. God works in incredible, but very possibly imperceptible ways. I have no idea how I have suddenly found a bunch of kids wanting to follow Jesus, but its happened. I have no idea how some of our young people reached the crossroads, and chose the Narrow Way, but they did. I have no idea most of the time what God has been doing.

But He's definitely a better builder than I am.

I think I'll stay out of his way for another year.

Z.

Encouragingly Discouraged

2011-10-25T02:25:00.000-07:00

I went to college with The Rev.

The Rev came to know Jesus as his saviour in the mid 80’s, at a time when he still had his sights firmly set on being a rock star. In fact he was the lead singer for a heavy metal band who had the distinction of playing with the legendary Christian Metal band “STRYPER” in the early 90’s. This was, of course, at a time when that genre of music was on the way out of pop-culture, and The Rev’s star did not shine for very long. It was, perhaps, his exposure to the music scene and the egos and personalities drawn to it that have informed his approach to ministry, more than any time spent in polite and quiet Christian company.
The Rev is the prototypical pot-stirrer; he loves to push people to the limits of their comfort zones, particularly when it comes to the questions of their faith. Nothing bothered him more than people who didn’t search the depths of their own faith; people who just sponged up whatever was put to them by their teachers and preachers; people who assumed that there was nothing more to being a Christian than being in the church on Sunday.
The Rev's favourite gag arose anytime conversation turned to end times theology. Someone would raise a question such as “Why doesn’t Jesus just return and take us away already?”; without missing a beat, “Oh He’s already taken the Christians.” People would begin talking about the rapture, “What’s it going to be like for people left behind?”, The Rev would say “You should know. This is it.” Of course, these comments were always received with good humor and a round of chuckles when they came up in our group at Bible College. It was when he would include them in his sermons that he would sometimes be met with a less than enthusiastic response. We thought it was hilarious when he did this – the elderly congregation at his church were not so amused.

I’m sure that there’s generally an openness amongst Christian communities to laugh at some of the tenets of our faith – appropriately of course. But it seems, sometimes, that when it comes to talking about matters apocalyptic, we can tend to get very serious. It’s not difficult to understand why: the scripture relating to Christ’s return, Armageddon, the Day of the Lord’s Judgement – these all affect a primal reaction from people. No matter your background, no matter who you are or where you come from, the instinctive reaction to such scripture is fear. Fear of what is yet to come; fear of the uncertainty; fear, because we don’t fully understand what’s going to happen.

The Thessalonians had that fear; and I think, apart from anything else we may learn today, that we can take a real measure of comfort in that fact. Remember that Paul began by thanking God for the remarkable faithfulness of this church, and the wonderful qualities that they embodied. If such an admirable community still struggled with a sense of unease about The End, it can’t be an unreasonable reaction for us.
But Paul certainly didn’t want to leave his friends with their doubts and fears. So he writes in order to address what, at the time, was the biggest struggle for the Thessalonian church: (vs. 1-4) “Concerning the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and our being gathered to him, we ask you, brothers, not to become easily unsettled or alarmed by some prophecy, report or letter supposed to have come from us, saying that the day of the Lord has already come. Don’t let anyone deceive you in any way, for that day will not come until the rebellion occurs and the man of lawlessness is revealed, the man doomed to destruction. He will oppose and will exalt himself over everything that is called God or is worshipped, so that he sets himself up in God’s temple, proclaiming himself to be God.”

Right off the bat, Paul addresses the issue that was most relevant at that particular moment – and it’s one that we still contend with today. Apparently, someone had been tooling around Thessalonica claiming that they had come from Paul, or that they had a letter from Paul, and was telling everyone that the day of the Lord had already come, and God’s children were already gathered to Him. A little bit like my buddy Walt, except they weren’t trying to be funny. Now, to clarify, they weren’t teaching that the Christians had already been taken to heaven or anything like that. What they were saying was that Jesus was already with His people, in every sense that He ever promised that He would be. Now, I have had a little trouble getting my mind around what that means, but when I found a surprisingly contemporary illustration, I understood it a lot better.
Sometime around 1874 a pastor by the name of Charles T. Russell calculated, from the Bible, that the world would end in that year. When that year came and went, he revised his calculations, of course found the spot where he had made a made a slight error, and determined now that the world would end in 1914. After the world not ending for a second time Russell found his credibility a little stretched, but his protégé J. F. Rutherford figured it all out. Jesus actually had returned on the first of October, 1914, only He did so invisibly. And so Jesus is now with His people, waiting only for the last few to come together, at which point he will lead them all to the centre of His Kingdom from which the rest of us will be shut out. Charles T. Russell’s initial group of followers called themselves the Zion Watch Tower Tract Society, and in 1931 changed it to Jehova’s Witnessess.
Charles T. Russell and J. F. Rutherford are not unique in their assertions about the Biblical apocalypse. William Miller, Ellen G. White, Joseph Smith, Sun Myung Moon, Charles Manson, David Koresh – these are just some of the names of individuals who have built significant followings by preying on people’s fear of the end times. More than that, however, they have all claimed some divine revelation or commission that has informed their practices. Three of these guys claimed to actually be Jesus.

Paul starts off by telling us not to get worked up. The trouble faced by the Thessalonians has been faced by the Church constantly for the past two thousand years, and it’s probably never going to stop. We face it today in less obvious guises than cult leaders as well. There is a growing contingent of modern Church leaders who are writing books and teaching all about why we can expect the end of the world any day now because all of the signs line up.
I can vaguely remember, growing up, a Christian film that came out – actually I think it was a series of films. The first one was called “A Thief in the Night”, and it dealt with the book of Revelation. It was, basically, a fictional story that was meant to inform Christians as to exactly what would happen with Jesus decided to return. The main result I can remember this film accomplishing was scaring the tar out of me and my sister. In fact, it kind of disturbed quite a few people in the church who had come along to see it. All kinds of questions were being thrown around “So is it true that barcodes are the mark of the Beast?”, “What if we’re asleep when Christ comes?”. People were getting a bit worked up over this, so much so that I think my Dad kind of regretted having shown the flick in the first place.
Scripture is not here to disturb us, and make us question whether we’re getting things right, and leave us uncertain about the future. Remember what Paul left us with last week: that God may fulfil every good purpose of yours and every act prompted by your faith; and now how he opens this teaching by asking us not to become easily unsettled or alarmed. What he goes on to describe is the struggle that we will deal with until the day Jesus returns – we must deal with powers that want to do away with the gospel; with forces that reject our integrity; with people who want to put themselves up on the pedestal before all people that only God should be seated on. We will face the man of lawlessness constantly until Christ returns, and things may get worse before they get better.

But God’s not interested in telling us who the man of lawlessness is – even though it’s become a very popular guessing game amongst biblical scholars through the years: The antichrist has, alternately, been three of the Roman emperors, the Pope, the entirety of the Catholic Church, Martin Luther, the entirety of the Protestant church, Islam, Buddhism, Ronald Regan and Mikhael Gorbachev, just to name a few. God doesn’t want us to waste time trying to figure out the answer to questions that aren’t going to actually help us shape the world to come anyway. In the same way he doesn’t want us knowing the exact date of His return, or the exact manner of His return, or any number of details about his return that have little to do with us and what we’re doing. For us it’s enough to know that He is returning, and that truth should spur us on to spreading the Word to as many as we can. And just so we’re not surprised when we get hit by opposition, He lets us know something of what we will face.

But what Paul wanted to leave the Thessalonians with, and what he leaves us with, is a supreme sense of hope. (vs. 13) “But we ought always to thank God for you, brothers loved by the Lord, because from the beginning God chose you to be saved through the sanctifying work of the Spirit and through belief in the truth.” We who are in Christ are reassured that we will not be overcome by the powers of evil and lawlessness. Though it is interesting that Paul takes this opportunity to not only reassure, but to remind us that this salvation is not simply open to all. God has chosen us to be saved by His Spirit, through our belief in His Word.

Why talk about this antichrist at all? If it’s not important to understand the details, then why bother mentioning it at all? Again, the hope that God brings to us must go side-by-side with His justice, and His divine judgement. In teaching the Thessalonians about the secret power of lawlessness, Paul is answering one of the most common questions that smart alecs use to try and trip me up when I want to talk about God’s love and grace. You’ve heard it before: “If a serial killer, or even Hitler, repents on their death bed, that means they go to heaven right?” Usually the only answer I have ever been able to give is to assume that given the utter depravity of such individuals, that kind of death bed confession would never happen.
Paul tells us, this isn’t that far from the truth.
(vs. 9-12) “The coming of the lawless one will be in accordance with the work of Satan displayed in all kinds of counterfeit miracles, signs and wonders, and in every sort of evil that deceives those who are perishing. They perish because they refused to love the truth and so be saved. For this reason God sends a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie and so that all will be condemned who have not believed the truth but have delighted in wickedness.”
God sends a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie. This is the reason that we hear about the end, and the antichrist and some of what is to come. A part of it is so that we will know the kinds of behaviours to avoid as servants of God, that’s always useful; but more importantly we are reminded that God is JUST, and injustice won’t stand. For those who would delight in the destruction of others, who would profit off others misery, who would intentionally bring disaster on another, God tells us in no uncertain terms that He will not let them get away with it. These people will not turn to God and be saved, because they will have embraced the false divinity of another. Really, that’s what an antichrist is: anything that sets itself up to take the place of God in our lives.

If scripture is ever consistently vague on a topic, rest assured that the topic will not be critical to your salvation – the details were not meant to concern us. Remember also that no part of scripture should be read or understood in a vacuum. This is not the only passage of the bible that talks of the antichrist – not by a long shot. If there is ever confusion, bring all the teaching from the bible together and consider what it means when it’s all put together. It’s by doing this that we experience two really fantastic benefits that God intended scripture to give us:

Firstly, we are reassured as we draw upon the truth of the Word of our salvation, and of the love that God has for us. Secondly, we are better equipped to do the works of faith that God desires of us, because we will know more of the kinds of things that God actually wants us doing.
I think if we focus ourselves on that, we will be well prepared for Jesus to come back. We will be serving the kingdom in some way, and Jesus will suddenly be there, and we’ll say to Him “Finally! We’ve been really busy...waiting on you.”

“May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.”

Here's to one more year in The Son...

2011-10-18T02:37:00.000-07:00

I've commented before on the remarkable ability for the human emotional state to shift on a dime; to turn from despair to joy in a heartbeat, with all the force of a hurricane.

I don't think I will ever cease to be amazed by this.

I'm more amazed by this than by how stupid I am capable of being. I say this not to encourage a chorus of sympathy and "aw...no"'s from you, my complimentarians (though I won't turn it down if you really want to pat me on the back), only because I'm not sure how else to categorise the state of being in which I am constantly required to learn the same lessons - over, and over, and over, and over, and over...

Faith - God's always got my back.

Contentment - God's always got my back.

Courage - God's always got my back.

Grace - God's always...do I have to say it again?

I let myself get a little twisted about next year - I allowed the uncertainty of tomorrow to cloud the way I approached today. And tomorrow turned out to be pretty good. In fact it was quite beautiful. I was encouraged; I was honored; I was made a fuss over. I like it when I get made a fuss over.
In the end though, it shouldn't have mattered what the outcome of our Youth Ministry Fund Raising Dinner was - I know by now that God has things well in hand. Even the big things. 'Cause He's got big hands. Like, really big hands.
The trials and testing of these past two years do not compare to what I know God has been doing in me, and in Small Town VIC. I'm excited to be a part of His work in this corner of the world, and doubtless the year ahead will hold much more zany adventures.

Right now, it feels for me like the calm after a storm. I'm still trying to catch my breath for the past few weeks - even months. I know, though, that others continue to walk a harder road, and I need to remind myself that a part of what we are called to - all of us who are in Christ - is to be whatever those around us who are hurting need us to be. Someone close-by has been living that reality for me, and I am challenged to follow the lead.

We said our Final Goodbye to a friend recently. My best friend (I've referred to him here as Awesome X) lost his father (whom I have called, on these pages, The Wizard). My loss can in no way compare to what his family is going through, but again I have noted the way in which the heart shifts in sudden ways to enable us to cope with life. The great tragedy, as I have felt it, is that "life" doesn't stop when something like this happens - everyone has to carry on with everything they've been doing, as well as cope with new burdens while they try their best to neatly tie off the pieces of their lost loved one's existence. Knowing that friends are close helps, I think, but not being surrounded by noise.
To seek a stillness - a quiet place - a place of comfort; I watch my friend and see him craving this. And I cannot help but think that what he craves now is the aggravating of something that every one of us wants all the time, but we don't really think to look for it until...I don't know.

But it sounds familiar to me - like something I've learned before, but (obviously) need to keep being re-taught:

Psalm 46:10 - "Be still...and know that I am God."

The only comfort I have ever known.

May our year in The Son find us such stillness.

Raise your glasses...

One Step at a Time

2011-10-10T18:26:00.001-07:00

When I was in high school, my best friend – Julien – and I used to constantly get into discussions about faith and religion and God. These would often turn into unheated debates – until the rest of the group got involved, at which point I would find myself up against a brick wall facing a proverbial firing squad of atheism. But when it was just me and Julien, things were very civilised, save possibly for the fact that I was constantly frustrated by his inability to see the truth as I was so plainly laying it out for him. On several occasions he said to me “Lindsay, I’d like to believe. I really would. I’d like to have faith...but I just don’t. It’s not that simple.”

As a high school student, I just didn’t know how to respond to that. “That takes faith that I don’t have.” That’s pretty much an all-purpose conversation stopper.

When I began working I went through a few jobs that allowed me to build up something of a collection of name tags. In every one I met people who, like Julien, were willing to get into friendly discussions about God, but ultimately would end things by saying that they just didn’t have faith to see things the way Christians do. For five years I worked in an aged care facility, and continued to meet people whose understanding of God was obscured by that lack of faith. One chap named Brian would ask me what I planned to do with my life. When I told him I was heading for ministry, he said “Oh, that’s all a whole load of bunk.” Actually I think his language was a bit more colourful, but he meant well. I asked if he’d ever thought much about religion or faith. “No” was the emphatic reply “I’ve never needed that sort of junk to get through life.” Again, he spoke it with more colour.

I find the same kind of trouble when trying to communicate the concept of hope to people. Only, when it comes to hope, it’s usually believers I’m speaking with. People with faith of some measure, who nonetheless can’t see through their bleak circumstances the way that others seem to. It is a sad fact that many Christians stumble through their lives of difficulty and hardship and never come to that point of living in the “joy of the Lord” because everything that surrounds them is just bleak, bleak, bleak. When we try to speak words of hope into their lives, we get the weary response “I hear what you’re saying...but I just can’t see it. I just don’t get any sense of hope.” I have seen far too many friends give up on God, because they just didn’t have hope.

What we are left with is the impression that this life is only for some people – those who are ”wired” the right way. Christianity will only really work for individuals of a certain disposition, and while we may try to convince others of the value of God’s Word, the deciding factors are just part of the way a person is made; or raised; or has chosen to be.

Paul has quite a different notion. In his 2^nd letter to the church at Thessalonica he opens with an exhortation: (vs. 3-4) “We ought always to thank God for you, brothers, and rightly so, because your faith is growing more and more, and the love every one of you has for each other is increasing. Therefore, among God’s churches we boast about your perseverance and faith in all the persecutions and trials you are enduring.”
“Your faith is growing more and more.” In Paul’s 1^st letter to the Thessalonians, he opens in much the same way: (ch. 1 vs. 2-3) “We always thank God for all of you, mentioning you in our prayers. We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labour prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.” A church which, among all the churches that Paul was in touch with, set an admirable example in their faith, perseverance and love. A church that Paul could point to and say to others “Now that is how God wants to work through his people!” Such faith that not once but twice Paul makes sure to commend them before God.
But the second time Paul adds this: “your faith is growing more and more.”

We tend to speak of faith static terms as something we have or not. ‘I wish I had your faith’, we say, like ‘I wish I had your complexion’ as if it were a genetic endowment. Or we complain ‘I’ve lost my faith’, like ‘I’ve lost my spectacles’, as if it were a commodity. But faith is a relationship of trust in God, and like all relationships is a living, dynamic, growing thing. It is similar with love...and, undoubtedly, hope.
Faith, like hope, is not a light switch. It doesn’t just function in an “on” position, or else leave everything dark. Faith is a fire – fuel it, and it will grow; give attention to it, and it will thrive; pour into it, and it will become powerful.

Faith is an evident thing. Faith is more than some state of mind that allows you to believe the unbelievable. Faith is when you live out something extraordinary – “A work produced by faith”. Faith is the way we live to change the world around us. It’s hard to believe we can do anything – and indeed, in our own strength we never could. Faith enables us to transform; to change. It requires action. And initially we may only have faith enough for small things. For some, just stepping through the doors of a church might be a difficult act of faith. Speaking openly about what you believe for the first time may be completely nerve racking. Being willing to leave behind everything in your life right now, and go to some distant place you’ve never heard of to transform that part of the world? Well, don’t feel bad: most of us aren’t there yet.

Our faith grows by taking those small, initial steps. When we do, God ratifies them, and He comes through for us. We discover that we can talk about our faith to our friends, we can begin to be a better person, we can do all things, through Christ who gives us strength. With each step our faith grows , enabling us to do bigger things.

But what are these works in aid of? Where are these steps of faith leading us? If we are growing in faith, for what purpose are we doing it? These are the questions asked when faith intersects with hope.
The Church knows discouragement. Jesus said that to be his followers in this world meant that we would be persecuted for his sake. The church at Thessalonica certainly knew this to be true. While Paul’s first letter was written not too long after he had first founded the church (which means that there really hadn’t been enough time for them to get anything majorly wrong yet), his second letter comes after a period of time in which the city of Thessalonica had begun to press hard upon the church. There was a fairly strong Jewish community there, and they took great exception to the followers of Jesus. Members were put on public trial; dragged from their homes; citizens rioted against the church – just think about that for a moment. Think about the persecution we have experienced from others because of our faith; now imagine arriving at church in the morning only to find you can’t get in because a crowd of angry protesters are filling the street, blocking the doors and breaking windows.

It hadn’t taken long for the Thessalonians to face this – as a church they were tested, and how. Would their newfound faith prevail? Yes, because of their newfound hope.

Hope, like faith, grows. It is a relationship. It is a fire. Hope, regardless of who is defining it, is quite simply the promise of a reality that is not yet. The heroin addict hopes that he will experience that delirious drug again soon; the young student with a crush hopes that they will end up in a relationship with the object of their affection; the politician hopes their party will end up in power. Our hope for a different reality allows us to endure the discomfort of our present reality, because we know that it won’t last.
Our hope as Christians is no different. It is the same hope that the Thessalonians had, and Paul acknowledges it in this letter: (vs. 6-10) “God is just: He will pay back trouble to those who trouble you and give relief to you who are troubled, and to us as well. This will happen when the Lord Jesus is revealed from heaven in blazing fire with his powerful angels. He will punish those who do not know God and do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus. They will be punished with everlasting destruction and shut out from the presence of the Lord and from the majesty of his power on the day he comes to be glorified in his holy people and to be marvelled at among all those who have believed. This includes you, because you believed out testimony to you.”

Our hope is a unique hope, because it is an eternal hope. We can hope for things in this life that may come to pass and will be nice while they last, but eventually they will fade away, and we’ll be left feeling the exact same discouragement we felt when we were waiting for it before.
But Christ, our hope, promises so much more. When he comes to complete the work produced by our faith, he will put an end to our troubles; within us he will be glorified – we will be glorious reflections of him; he will be with us in majesty forever.
Paul makes it clear that this is not hope for everyone. This hope requires faith in Christ Jesus. This hope involves those who have chosen to work towards that same reality. There is some scary language used in this letter that leaves very little room to doubt as to what will happen to those who have rejected God. (vs. 9) “They will be punished with everlasting destruction and shut out from the presence of the Lord”. It’s not a terribly affirming thought – it’s not encouraging language. In fact, certainly in the politically correct age in which it is very uncouth to suggest that there are negative consequences associated with religion, this is almost discouraging. Discouragement and Hope – you rarely find one without the other in the Bible.
Why is our hope so solid? Why can we be so certain of a trouble-free eternity with our Lord?

Because “God is just”. And a simple and inescapable result of God being just is that if our world is to be trouble free, then the trouble makers will have to be stopped. They won’t be able to do whatever they want while others suffer for it. Not in God’s Kingdom.

But how does our hope increase? I have a friend who has endured more hardship in his life than I care to recount. The real heart-break of his story is that the hardship doesn’t end. Every time it seems as though his great trials are finally over, something else happens. He and his wife lost a child early this year – the day after the funeral, they received a notice to vacate their home. It is difficult to talk with him about hope.
But he’s never given up on God – he has never packed in on his faith, and there is one reason for that: Warwick’s hope is for the life he will lead upon Jesus return. That is the reality he knows he is working for, the reality he and his family are living for. Sure, it would be nice to catch a break this side of eternity (and I’m not saying that God won’t do that for some of us, because God has good things to give us in this reality), but all Warwick needs right now is to know that he’s heading for a kingdom in which there will be no more mourning or crying or pain – for the old order of things will have passed away.

Some of you may know the story of Joni Eareckson Tada. In 1967, while holidaying with family, she took a dive off a raft into the Chesapeake Bay...into one and a half metres of water. She spent the next two years in hospital, learning to make the most of the only movement that was left to her: turning her head.
Through the compassion and care of her friends and family, Joni came to a strong faith in God. She has become an author, radio host, singer, public speaker and advocate for people with disabilities. First and foremost, in all of her work, she wants to make Jesus known to others, and share the gospel with them. In her own words: “I can tell you honestly that I would really rather be in this chair knowing God the way I do, the peace and comfort that he gives, than to be on my feet without him. I can say that with a smile. That is quite a miracle.” Would she like to walk again? Of course. But Joni’s real hope is for the reality in which she knows that’s going to happen anyway. When the full glory of Jesus is realised inside of her, as it will be with you, and me.

The more we feed and act according to our faith, the more we will be placing our hope in the kingdom that is to come. The more our hope is found in Jesus, not in the things of this world, the greater the trials we will face. God doesn’t leave us static in the one place for long. As soon as we grow stronger, we are challenged all the more. But it is worth it.

“With this in mind, we constantly pray for you, that our God may count you worthy of his calling, and that by his power he may fulfil every good purpose of yours, and every act prompted by your faith. We pray this so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.”

Screwing Up Takes Skill

2011-07-24T22:29:00.000-07:00

1 Samuel 9:1-10:16

I could spend all day listing the characters who take their cues from this story. Think about it – the callow youth from humble background discovers that he is more than what he seems; encounters a wise old sage who helps him discover his destiny; embarks on a quest to prove himself; and finally takes his place as King/Jedi Knight/Kung-Fu Master/Saviour of the Universe. Every epic, mythical hero got their start right here in the book of Samuel. Everything about Saul makes him the perfect candidate for the new leader of the nation. Remember in chapter 8 we have been assured that a King is on the way – It may not be God’s perfect plan, but He has promised to provide one for His people. So here in chapter 9 we undertake the epic journey with Saul to discover God’s chosen one.

This would make a great movie.

Our story opens on a farm in the land of Gibeah. Kish, the landowner and head of the household, has awoken one morning to discover that the donkeys are missing! Kish, the father, heads into the house in search of his number one son: Saul. A farm boy he may be, but it is clear to anyone who so much as looks at him that he’s capable of greater things. “A young man without equal among the Israelites.” Taller, by at least a head, than any other man in the nation. Handsome, brave and strong. If God had allowed the Israelites to hold an election for their King, Saul would have been a prime candidate. A hero cut from the same mould as King Arthur, Aragorn and Luke Skywalker.
And so begins the Hero’s journey, for young Saul sets out on his quest. True, it’s not a very important quest in the great scheme of things – “find the donkeys!”; it’s not exactly “You must destroy the Ring of Power” or “You must rescue the Princess”; there’s not a lot of drama you can pull out of that – but it sets Saul off on the road that will lead to his destiny.
We journey with Saul and his trusted sidekick...Saul’s servant. It’s not an easy road for them; they look high and low and travel far from home, but they just can’t find those blasted donkeys. Finally Saul exercises a bit of rational thinking and says “Y’know, Dad’s probably getting pretty worried about us. Are these donkeys really worth it?” Saul realises that his duties on the farm, and his responsibility to his father, are being neglected. He is mindful of his place in the world. So sure, it’s a shame about the donkeys, but he can’t leave his father to carry the burden of the homestead on his own.
“Well, hold on a second,” says the servant, “not too far from here there is a mysterious and old wise man who may be able to help us out. I just happen to have a little something to offer him as a gift; why don’t we go and see if he can help us?” Saul, being a God-fearing Israelite, figures that seeking the advice of the Man of God probably would be the right thing to do. As they approach the town where this mysterious and wise old prophet lives, they encounter a couple of girls doing...whatever it is that incidental characters in stories do that cross their paths with the main character.

Let’s pause the story for a moment and consider what this is telling us about our God. Consider for a moment the series of events that have brought Saul this far – not necessarily common occurances, but far from earth shattering importance. Missing donkeys; searching for the lost animals; a search that took him further and further from home, because his donkeys were nowhere to be seen; the servant thinks there is someone who can help, and has just enough coin in his purse to offer as a gift; strangers with directions to help him get there. A series of unconnected and mundane events. As far as kings quests go, this one seems pretty tame. But every turn has led him here, to Samuel’s doorstep. And now we read: (vs 15-17)

There was an author to this story. There was a will that led a cast of strangers and donkeys on their mundane, uneventful journeys so that Saul could come to this place, so that Israel could have their king. When we talk about the sovereignty of God, this is what we mean. God is the author, and He is the main character in the story. He crafts the story better than any epic fantasy writer, because God knows that the key is not making sure the tiny collection of main characters get to the big scenes at the right time – the key is the everyday, ordinary people playing their part in making the story happen. Saul was fulfilling a mundane task; the servant was helping Saul fulfil a mundane task; the girls were living their mundane lives; donkeys are pretty mundane – and God was working through all of them for the sake of his people’s future. God’s will enacted by our everyday coming and going. That’s an amazing thought isn’t it?

Of course, the only people who had a clue about any of this in the story were God and Samuel. I think if the characters had any inkling of how their seemingly insignificant contributions were helping to shape their nation they’d be tempted to get a little self-important...or they might completely freak out and not get out of bed in the morning. But they don’t need to know – what God requires of His people is obedience in the small things; the everyday things; the things for which His people don’t expect to hear His voice commanding them. When they go to work, or when they go shopping, or when they encounter strangers on the road. When God’s people are living everyday in obedience, God uses that.

Samuel has been preparing for the arrival of the promised King. In fact, Samuel invites Saul to be the guest of honour at a banquet in town. Saul replies, in what seems to be quite a typical fashion for men in the bible who are marked by God for great things: “Who am I? I’m nobody! I’m nothing!” God, as is typically his way, doesn’t bother paying much attention to this display of modesty.
Following the feast, Samuel puts Saul and his servant up at his place for the night, and the next morning sends them on their way. But Samuel has something in store for Saul – further proof that all that has happened, and all that is yet to happen, is in the hands of Yahweh. After anointing Saul with oil, Samuel tells him everything that’s going to happen on the journey home. He will meet two men at Zelzah who will inform him of the fate of his donkeys (for those who have been concerned about the poor animals, they made it home just fine – more of God’s grace!); then Saul will meet three men at Tabor – one with three goats, one with three loaves, one with a skin of wine – and will receive two loaves from them; finally Saul will reach his hometown where he will fall in with a procession of prophets. At this point the Spirit of God will come upon Saul in power, and he will prophesy with them. Ch. 9 vs. 9
Now, these prophets are not the same as people like Samuel or Isaiah. Those guys are mouthpieces for God to instruct His people directly. These prophets are a group praising God and displaying their devotion to Him through music, dance and a kind of hysteric trance that they would get into. These guys were the original “happy clappy” Christians, and not everyone was of the disposition to join in with them. Saul certainly wasn’t, at least, not until now. When the people watching asked “Is Saul also among the prophets?” it was because they would never have expected this behaviour from him. But this is an important moment for both Saul and the people. One of them asks “And who is their father?” which was his way of acknowledging that God is the force that compels them to this display of worship. God now compels Saul to, very publicly, join in with a display of praise to God that he previously would never have volunteered for.

Why did God bring this manifestation of the Spirit upon Him? Why did God have Samuel explain everything that was about to happen to him?

Because God is in control, and He wanted Saul to know it. He wants His people to know it. The author of the story is compelling these actions because when everyone looks back there can be no doubt as to who made it all possible. God doesn’t actually make it easy for us to mess things up – this story is an ultimate example of that. God uses the minutia of the everyday to bring about the encounters that He wants, and when He wants people to go to a certain place, or respond a certain way, He has no trouble making it happen. We actually have to work a little bit a messing up God’s plans.

This passage occupies a bit of an awkward place in scripture. It immediately follows a warning to Israel that the King that will be appointed will be a lousy leader for the nation; it is itself about the appointment of that same king; and in just a few chapters, we will read of the fall of this king through his refusal to submit to God’s will.
So when we read about this “young man without equal among the Israelites”, and we see his reasonable attitude and his willing nature, what are we to think of him? I would point you all, again, to the sovereignty of God. God shows that He is in control of all circumstances; He actually works in such a way so that it becomes very difficult for humanity to mess up his plans. God doesn’t intentionally choose a useless, lazy and pathetic specimen who is resigned to failure from the start. He chooses a capable and, as far as we can tell, righteous young man who would be perfect for the role. He directs his path, and empowers him to do the work that lays before him. God is ensuring that there is every possibility of success for Saul; although He sees the impending disaster, God is determined to bring as much good out of the situation as He can – pre-emptively.

That is the God we serve. The perfect author, who has crafted the plot with care and attention to detail. Who will see Good triumph over evil...every time. Whose will is done on earth, just as in heaven. What we need to do is make ourselves a part of His story. We have His guidance everyday – He’s already given us His Word. We don’t need a pillar of fire or a voice from the heavens to tell us how we are supposed to obey God. And we shouldn’t make the mistake of thinking that the story is about us. The story is about the author; the less importance we have riding on us, the better. No, I’d much rather be one of the incidental characters. Just living life, serving God as best as I can in the everyday, because if I am faithful to him in my every breath – every encounter with a stranger or a close friend; every time I turn left or right; every word I speak – he might just be using that to bring about a greater purpose than I, or any of us, could fathom.

Bring It On!

2011-06-26T22:33:00.000-07:00

I'll be the first to admit that I'm not a fan of conflict.

Quite simply I don't like the notion that people might not like me. Rev. Cleese tells me that it's hard for him to imagine people not liking me. I'm just so, gosh darn...

Well, you know it already. Otherwise you wouldn't bother reading this, right?

Some people manage to thrive on conflict - that's not me. The first place my brain runs to if I have a disagreement with someone is 'What have I done to them to make them hate me?' Strange, no matter the context, that I seem ready to take criticism so personally.
Of course, I've dealt with my share of people who genuinely didn't like me (hard to believe, I know) but I never have to endure relationship with those people. Soon enough those voices are a vague memory. But the last thing I want to hear is the voices that remain telling me "You got that wrong", "Don't be naive" or "That's not how you make porridge!"

But our conflicts, certainly from a biblical perspective, need not be bad. In fact, they can (and should) be quite fruitful.

Proverbs 27:17 says "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." If God wanted churches full of individuals who agreed on every aspect of the bible and faith and church life and had all see the "Star Wars" trilogy...well, we'd have so much less conflict. But we'd be poorer and less dynamic for the loss.
When I enter into conflict (read: disagreement) with my boss, or with my team or with anyone, I'm forced to assess everything about the point of view I would like to propagate: Where did I learn it? How long have I thought this way? Does the bible support it? Where does the bible speak about it? Is it worth being precious about?

Sparking, like clashing irons, forces me to consider what I really believe, and why. And, honestly, I have had to let go of more...unhelpful...perspectives this way. Peter and Paul had conflict, and it forced both of them to focus themselves more completely on the ministries they were called to. Who benefits from that?

The church.

"Fellowship" means More.

2011-05-22T19:50:00.000-07:00

Mt. 10:5-10 – Phil. 1:1-5, 4:14-18

When Jesus sent out his followers the first time, he told the twelve: “Do not take along any gold or silver or copper in your belts; take no bag for the journey, or extra tunic, or sandals or a staff; for the worker is worth his keep.”

Just between us...those are words that members of the clergy love to hear.

This directive is given for a number of reasons:

· To prioritise the mission over the missionaries – the disciples are not to consider their own comfort in spreading the Good News.

· To highlight the value of the Gospel – The news of Jesus is not valuable because it brings coin to the pocket; it is of immense value because it is the true Word of God.

· To produce faith in the disciples – Because of the uncertainty of their well-being in this task, they were forced to rely fully on God for everything.

This is not necessarily an exhaustive list of reasons. These reasons are highlighted because it gives us as followers of Jesus a picture of what the life of service can look like for those who have been called to it.
Some of us tasked with sharing the Gospel – in order to fulfil our mission – will have to forgo comforts, security, peacefulness, food, shelter, companionship...the list goes on. For such servants of the Gospel, the example to follow is exemplified by Jesus, but summarised by the apostle Paul whose list of credentials for being an apostle are so stark that it would make Ghandi cringe to think about.

When Paul wrote to his friends of the church at Philipi he addressed them by saying: “I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now”.

I know how that feels.

This word “partnership” – or koinon in the Greek – recurs throughout this letter. It is the word from which we derive our own "fellowship", though for Paul it meant so much more than the fairly soft way in which we use it to describe our church services. Koinon denoted a full partnership - two parties both united and sold out to the same cause. Paul is continually thanking and praising the Philipians for the role they have played in promoting the Gospel.
The church at Philipi were not rich; they were not evidently huge in numbers; but they were the first church to have been established in Europe, and they embraced a role in ministry that, frankly, staggers me to think about. I have never in my life encountered a church that is as devoted to promoting the Gospel as the church at Philipi.
Paul, Silas, Barnabas and all the apostles travelled a lot, and did not settle for long in cities. So it’s important to understand that while the Philipians knew Paul, and had been ministered to by him, you could by no means consider Paul to be their pastor. He was never there much. Nonetheless, the Philipians recognised the mission that Paul was called to – to spread the Good News of Jesus throughout the world, making disciples of all nations and baptising – and decided to make his mission their own responsibility.
Today, in order to support one missionary and perhaps his family, it takes the involvement of at least three churches, and then usually a number of individuals on top of that. Philipi was one church that committed to supporting several missionary’s, not in the short term, but as long as it took to accomplish their mission.

I, like many others, am able to do everything in my power to promote the gospel through my words, my work, my actions, my relationships and everything I have, because God and the Church have made it possible for me to do so.

What marks the church of Philipi as exceptional is that they gave not just generously, but eagerly. Almost as if they were saying to Paul “if we can’t actually be there with you when you’re ministering through the Word, then we are going to make sure that you have what you need to do it!”

This is the Godly attitude in giving. To give when common sense really tells you that you can’t afford it; when there’s no result close to home. To look out to the world and say “You are all my responsibility. I will do all I can for you, because Jesus did all He could for me!”

He could for me."

Don’t give your money because we tell you to. Don’t give your money because you feel guilty. Don’t give your money to try and buy some credit with God. Don’t give your money because it’s a theological principle to do so. Don’t give your money so that this building can keep standing. Don’t give your money so that this church will be open in fifty years time.

Give, because while you may not have the opportunity to share the message of the Gospel – you can make sure that people hear it.
Give, because you are a partner in the mission of promoting the Good News of Jesus.
Give, because this world falls into darkness and this may be how Jesus saves it.
Give, because you’ll burst if you can’t serve God with everything you have.

Mr. Mayer's Triptastic Time Machine

2011-02-27T22:36:00.000-08:00

The stage looks neat, and a little sparse; there'll only be four muso's playing tonight. At the front - by the microphone set up for the main attraction - is a good sized Persian rug. It's...nice, lending a sense of intimacy to the whole show - as though we're sitting in someones living room...just having a jam.
The crowd has been murmuring constantly, as crowds do - though it does sound as though there are clearly more ladies present than dudes. A figure steps onto stage and makes his way for the center; the ladies make their presence known with some high-pitched squealing.
The show's about to start. The anticipation is killing me.

He speaks.

"Thank you...it's good to be back in Birmingham."

He plays a few notes; sound checking.

"My name is John, and I'm gonna play you some songs I wrote, with my band."

A few notes - that last second tuning of the guitar; fiddles with the strings for a moment; another intense pause.

John turns slightly to the band; draws a deep breath...

...and begins.

And I'm 21 again.

I'm sitting at home in Belrose, playing cards with Dave, Grant, Ben and Glenn, listening to "Room for Squares" for the first time. I'm driving from Fernie to Bannf with Chris in the mid-winter. I'm jamming with Ben at Asquith. Everything's so much simpler here; things are working for me; life's better here.
"...I've been gone too long...can I still come home?.."
This happens every single time I put this DVD in the machine.

I've talked before about the strange power music has. How songs embed themselves in memory - how they imprint themselves on a time and place, never to be removed. Those songs recall more than words or ideas - they hold within themselves thoughts, feelings, sensations. I don't just remember where I've been...I go there.

A song is a flippin' time machine! I get to live those moments again. And again. And again.

There is nothing - nothing - that causes this nostalgia the way that music does. John's finished his first song of the evening, and launches into an energetic rendition of "No Such Thing", placing me back in the era when everyone was still officially 'newlywed' and Smallville was an awesome show. The world was full of possibilities and my head was full of hair - and if I could live those times over again I would not steadily erode my follicles with constant application of bleach.

Although I do look great with blue hair.

And as these songs work their phonomancy and carry me back to younger days, I find myself thinking I could give just about anything to be there again...or go back even further.

I put in Ben Folds Five "Unauthorised Biography", and I'm in Year 12, playing Doom 2 on Dad's computer when I should be studying. The "Romeo & Juliet" soundtrack, and I've just arrived at a new school. Seal's "Kiss From a Rose" and suddenly Batman Forever is a decent movie...ok, maybe not all of these trips are that great.
But still, I've found myself listening to a lot of time machines lately.

Maybe this is just me. Awesome X has told me that he doesn't have the tendency to dwell in the past - maybe this is just something that I go through when I feel a sense of being discontent with where I'm at. My heart is telling me to seek out a better time and a better place. Do these songs guide me to rediscover what I should really be doing with my life? Should I go back and revisit those life-defining questions that occupied me when I first heard "You Oughta Know" by Everyone's Favorite Angry White Girl™?

Aw man. John's just started "Something's Missing". Even he's feeling the awkwardness as now meets then.

Wait.

No. Jesus had something to say about this. "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God." (Luke 9:62) Crud. Where have I ended up while I've been looking over my shoulder at the 'there was a time...'? What have I risked in this ministry while I've been wishing things were as easy as they were when I was younger and - let's face it - stupider? Would I really consider quitting on God over something as trivial as nostalgia?

If I'm where God wants me - doing what He's asked of me - then why am I finding things so damn hard? Why was everything up until now so much easier?
Because our foe is a wily one. Because "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." (Eph. 6:12) And do you think he wants us feeling content with the now...when we can constantly be tormented by the fact that the past was always better than this.

My unease with the present is not who I really am, nor where I really am. It is what the enemy wants me to perceive as my reality. And the easiest way to do that is by comparison. How often have we thought a movie was good...until we saw a really good movie and realise that the first one isn't that good. Smarties taste good...until you try M'n'M's. Most people can't be satisfied going to Gloria Jeans anymore, once they've had some actually decent coffee.
The enemy holds up rose-tinted glasses to the past, making us feel like we've lost something in the present.

But that's not how God wants us to live.

I've likened music in the past to the standing stones that marked the places where God touched His people. Eternal reminders of the times when God pressed His finger into our hearts, for no other reason than He loves us and needs us to know. Perhaps He's done more for us than we know.
Because if I really think hard about the past - there's some crap that I'd just rather not think about. There's plenty I'd just as soon forget. But, rather than leave me with a head full of memories that leave a bitter taste in my mind, God has permanently adjoined my past with something that I am incapable of finding distasteful.

Music. Song.

God has used these time machines to alter the lasting impact that these memories can have. Disappointment in the past doesn't have to dictate my decisions now, because how can I be resentful of Steven Curtis Chapman's "Speechless"? Pain in the past doesn't hinder my progress in the present, because "Serious Fun" by the Paul Coleman Trio is just so much...well, fun. I can't remember those times without remembering the smile that "Dip" brings to my face, or how hauntingly beautiful it was when I first heard my sister sing "Breath of Heaven".

The enemy would like to twist this gift, and suggest that our past was better, and that we should really spend more of our time there. Pop "Sunshine on Leith" in the player and have a bit of a trip. But, as Switchfoot have said, we're meant to live for so much more. God's given me a gift to help me do just that.

Thank you God, for "Dare You to Move"

for "Higher" and "My Sacrifice"

for "Buses and Trains"

and definitely for "Like a Child"

...the list...the life...goes on...

Fruity Goodness

2011-02-13T19:21:00.000-08:00

I really envy the people living in Jesus day. I know that’s one of the deadly sins and Tim and i will discuss my penance tomorrow morning, but I won’t add lying to my confession list by trying to suggest that I’m not jealous. It’s not just that these people got to hang out with Jesus in the flesh, though that’s pretty awesome. It’s because of these last two verses right here:

“When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching, because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law.”

Pick your favourite TV show – as long as it’s not the news or a game show because this analogy will totally fall to pieces if it’s one of those. Now imagine that for the past few years, you’ve only had one single episode of that show to watch. That episode is all they show on TV, over and over again. You’ve looked in JB Hi Fi but the only DVD that they have is of that one single episode. That’s all you’ve got to watch for the foreseeable future. I’ll skip the obvious joke that would suggest that most TV shows just keep repeating the same story every episode anyway.
Now, this is your favourite show, so it’s still enjoyable. And you like to hang out with a group of people who share your interest in that show. You sit in coffee shops with this group and you talk about this episode of the show – and you offer each other theories on what the episode is about. And what’s great is that you keep finding new things to appreciate about the episode, and you can tell all your friends about them – and all your friends are noticing things that you miss; so you keep mining untold depths of this episode of your favourite TV show.
But, at the end of the day, after the 450^thtime you watch the episode, some of the impact is starting to lessen. You can anticipate every moment in the show – hey, you can probably recite the whole thing off by heart. It’s just...getting old.

I’ll wrap up the analogy now for those of you who have been saying from the start “I don’t watch TV”. Thanks for indulging the rest of us.

For most of us, there is The Word of God. We’ve heard it preached on, and we’ve heard it argued, and contested, and preached again, and discussed (hopefully with civility), and preached again, and then seen it made into television and movies. Look, you get the idea – there’s a lot of God’s Word to look at, but when you’ve been looking at it for a lifetime...sometimes I hear a sermon and instantly think “Yep, heard this”. I’ll read a commentary on the Bible and say, “Nup, nothing new.”

Why do I envy these people to whom Jesus was speaking? Because they got to hear something new. For the first time in thousands of years, they were being taught something new that mattered. Jesus wasn’t just elaborating on their sacred scriptures that they all knew by heart (though he was doing that too), he was giving them a new understanding. He taught with authority – he taught something that no one else had ever thought of.
For years the teachers of the law had been replaying and discussing the same episode of their favourite show. Jesus arrived, and said “here’s the next episode.” Ok, that’s it for television.

I have a few friends who have flirted with church over the years, but have never quite made that step into commitment. It’s been disappointing at times to watch friends who I thought had a commitment to Jesus drift away from church gradually, making excuses as to why it was the best thing for them. One such friend was having coffee with me one day, and offered a very post-modern thought about the bible: It’s high time for a new New Testament. Obviously, God spoke one way to his people at one point in time, then they outgrew those words, so he came again to give them a new message. We’ve outgrown that now, as a modern society, so it’s time God gave us something new...isn’t it?
This is the consumer mind of the West. I’m not sure I like this product...what else have you got? Does it come in a different color? Can I get that without the need for atonement? To jump over to another modern analogy, I’ve got the old software package – it’s high time I got an update.
By the shaking heads out there I’ll take as read that we all know that is not how God has spoken to us – that’s not what his gospel is about. But, unfortunately, it seems that I often encounter a similar mindset from the Church; from Christians. Parts of the bible are overlooked in our daily lives because they’re too uncomfortable or difficult to deal with. Or we just plain don’t like those parts. The Christian solution, rather than to demand a rewrite for the new millennium, is to just not talk about what we don’t like. Or, as I’m find more and more often to be the case, to argue that the passages we don’t like are context specific – they relate to a time and place that is not here and now.

But, here we see that Jesus has authority. He isn’t just making some fair to good suggestions for people – he is telling people exactly how this world should be. Because he knows – after all, he created it. And, speaking in authority, early in this same message he says to the people “I have not come to abolish the law, but to fulfil the law.”
God’s Word, every last letter and punctuation mark, never goes out of style; never becomes irrelevant; never loses its power. We forget that when we come to scripture with an attitude that says “What can it do for me now?” We need to come to scripture with an attitude that says “What does He want me to do now?”

What is it good for? Jesus has told us this in this passage. (vs24-25) “Everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.”
Listen to Jesus words, accept his authority, put them into practice, and what do you get? A life that can endure the hardship of...well, life. Unlike a television show, which has no real-world application that can inherently make your life better, Jesus is promising that His words, The Word of God, forms the basis for living in a world where the next set of bad news is inevitably no more than a good night’s sleep away.
While I might find it entertaining to base my life decisions on lessons I get from television, I’m going to find that Dr. Who has very little perspective to lend on coping with the loss of a job, or of a house. Watching Neighbors or Home and Away will not provide sound relationship advice. Watching Rumpole of the Bailey won’t teach me how to live a good life – that one was just for Tim.
But the Word of God is instruction that enables us to build a strong life, so long as we follow them. “Love your neighbour” – well, that’s actually greatly practical, and will make living life at home easier. But, “Love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you”? Well, it actually makes my life a lot less stressful if I don’t have to expend energy holding grudges. Thanks God. “Do not worry about your life” – good grief, that’s brilliant. God’s making sure I’m getting what I need? That makes everything so much more manageable. “Don’t look lustfully at a woman” – well, that will certainly cut out the number of slaps to the face I suffer when I talk to women. That’s practical. But, it’s also going to help me build healthier relationships with others.

I’m not going to go through every line of the Bible to illustrate the basic usefulness of Jesus instruction – you get the idea. When we treat Jesus authority as we should, and pay attention to His Words, our day to day lives become better quality. More than that, when the storms of life come our way, we are able to endure the pain and loss without succumbing to despair or resentment.
I’m not going to suggest that it’s all as easy as that – that Jesus commands are as simple as breathing – but particularly for those of us who would call ourselves ‘Christian’, who would consider ourselves followers of Jesus, there should be no higher goal in our lives than putting these words into practice in our lives. NO. OTHER. GOAL. Not buying a house; not getting married; not growing a church; not advancing in our job; not making a century in a cricket match. Everything should take a distant second to following Jesus, and obeying His Word.

So, given that following His Word is a difficult and, honestly, life-long learning process, how do we know that we are even on the right track? How do we know we are understanding his instruction properly, and putting it in place? How do we know – and this is an uncomfortable thought – but how do we know that the nice young man teaching Jesus Word from the front of the church isn’t misinterpreting everything and leading us straight to Hell!?!??

When we take a step back, Jesus gives us the answer to that too. (vs 16-20) “By their fruit you will recognise them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus, by their fruit you will recognise them.”
Jesus says, if you’re living right, you’ll know it. If those leading you are living right, you’ll know it. Is your day to day life improved as you try to follow God’s Word? Are you able to deal with the trials that life throws at you without chucking in the towel? Then you’re on the right journey. Are your teachers demonstrating love, and compassion, and discipline, and integrity (that’s a big one)?Then they’re on the right journey.

Tim spoke last week about judging, and how no-one likes to be judged in society, and Christians are often unwilling to hold up standards to the rest of society because we fear being thought of as judgmental. Well, there’s another curious symptom of this in the life of a Christian, and that is an unwillingness to question the standards of others who call themselves ‘Christian’. What’s our modern criteria for a Christian? Someone who comes to church. Is that enough? No it’s not. But we so often don’t know how to ask the questions that will bring a person to examine their relationship with God. Perhaps, sometimes, because we don’t want to have to think too hard about our own relationship with God. If we can’t know that someone is really a follower, though, how can we know how to lead them, or help them to put Jesus in His rightful place in their lives?
“By their fruit you will know them.” It will be obvious in the way their lives – I should say, our lives – can be observed. If we know the teaching “Love your enemies”, but are justifying a grudge against someone – anyone – then that’s bad fruit. If we know the teaching “Do not worry”, but are constantly tormented by where the money is going to come from to cover our next bills, and how can I afford to run the car properly and how will I have enough to buy food...that’s bad fruit.
What does good fruit look like? Well, funnily enough, that’s shown us in God’s Word as well. Gal. 5:22-23 “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”

When you can see these things, you can see Jesus, and you can see a Christian.

I'll give what...who for?

2011-01-30T21:00:00.000-08:00

That question has been on my mind a great deal lately.

What for?

People put salt on their food...what for?

Ladies at my church curtsy before heading out the front for communion...what for?

I continue to defend Tom Cruise...what for?

Isn't that the question that should drive what we do? With everything that we spend our time and money and energy on, shouldn't we be able to clearly be able to let people know...well, what for? What for - it's a declaration of intent; a statement of goals; a faithful proclamation of the intended outcome. Every action, decision, plan and idea should have What For.

But I don't know how much I think about it...really. I'm like the Joker in "The Dark Knight", y'know. I'm a dog chasing cars...I just...do...things. And I tell ya, it's actually kind of tiring.

I hear the same from a number of people, both in ministry and in everyday life. Both Christians and people who don't know Jesus. People wind up feeling like they're chasing their tails...or someone else's tail. We have laundry lists of things to do before the day is out, and half the time, if pressed, we couldn't honestly give an answer as to their purpose.

But, I guess...well they need to be done. Right?

We pour hours of effort into making our Sunday church services something impressive...what for?
We cancel dinners or coffee's with friends because we have to make space for a work meeting...what for?
I push myself to read my Bible every day...what for?
I put on deodorant after my shower...what for?

Well...okay, there's quite a few people who'd be happy to explain that one to me.

My point is, how much do we allow ourselves to do in this life, and how much do we tell ourselves we cannot do in this life, without considering what these things are for. What they are in the service of? How much do we do...just because?
Just because...my pastor tells me to do it.
Just because...everyone else at church seems to be doing it.
Just because...I heard that it's had BIG results in America...

These aren't reasons. People very rarely give good reasons for the things we do. Even ministers. It seems like a good idea...but the end result for everybody seems to be burnout and a mild sense of resentment.

Maybe we should adjust the question a little bit.

(Col. 3:23) "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart,
as working for the Lord, not for men"

How much would this change our attitude about the things we do? To keep in mind, always, that we are doing everything we do for God? I think it would have two effects.

One: The things we do would actually matter.

Two: We'd stop doing things that were pointless...'cause God's not into pointless.

He is into us though. He is into us.

Zizi out.

Is it ok to wear an award for being humble...?

2011-01-23T20:05:00.000-08:00

So John’s been baptising people from all over the nation. He’s been preaching some pretty heavy stuff to both the clergy and the laity. He’s been saying things that people generally don’t want to hear –
“Don’t rely on your religious upbringing to get you into heaven!”
“We’re all of us in the same sinking boat of humanity!”
“Not a single human being on the face of this planet is worthy of anything."

Of all the words that could be used to describe John the Baptist, coy would not be among them. This was not a guy who sent out mixed messages. People suggest that what makes an expert is the fact that one person will one thing for so long that they know nothing more than they know that one thing. Well guess what John the Baptist’s One Thing was: that’s right. He called people to repent. Everyone. That’s all he dealt with, day in and day out – broken, flawed, guilty, sinful humans. From one angle, John’s job description couldn’t be simpler. But which one of us wants to be the person telling everyone we see “You’re a rotten sinner – get in the water!”

Why the water? When Jewish people were to come to the temple for worship or to offer sacrifice, they would sometimes wash themselves to symbolise their desire to come to God free of their filth and brokenness. When people from other nations wanted to come to the God of Israel and worship, they were baptised to symbolise the washing away of their old way of life, and becoming clean in the worship of the One True God.
What John was saying was that as far as God was concerned, every single human shared the same level of sin and separation from God. Whether you were a common fisherman, a religious leader, a learned Pharisee, a poor farmer, a tax collector, a Rabbi, a Greek or a Roman, you were scum compared to The Almighty. For years, this is what John preached, this is what he taught, this is how he lived and it is what he expected of everyone who came to see him.

And then one day, the one who was to come after...showed up.

The subject of baptism can be a divisive one in churches. I’ve seen arguments about the nature of this ritual see people leave their church communities, while others are denied the opportunity to participate in ministry. Every denomination, it seems, has a spin on baptism that makes it unique to them, and often makes them very unwilling to readily accept the practice of others that “just doesn’t seem right to us.”

I thought perhaps this might be an opportunity to set the record straight. “What can I draw from this passage” I asked myself “that will effectively and for all time definitively end the debate about baptism?” I read carefully these five verses; I read several knowledgeable scholars ideas about its meaning; I began to carefully craft a powerful message; I planned the emotional journey of those of you listening to rise and fall appropriately – ultimately bringing you all to the realisation that Jesus example in baptism has shown us all how we are to conduct ourselves throughout eternity. Realising that this message was far too important to simply be preached and, perchance forgotten (an unlikely occurrence, I know) I organised a device to record my message and post it online, so that this great correction of church doctrine would be available to everyone who needed to hear it – which, of course, means everyone. I figured on being invited to preach on the subject at other churches, in order that they may fully grasp my superior understanding of scripture, and ultimately foresaw the genesis of a number of national and international conferences to teach ministers from all over the world in this ground-breaking and revolutionary practice of theology...and also to promote my new book “How baptism works: what you’re doing wrong and how to do it right”.

The movie rights for the book will be optioned in 2013, and the resulting film will usher in an era of world peace and prosperity.

You’re welcome.

What more defining characteristic of humanity’s brokenness is there than our pride? To think that there is something about me that sets me apart from the rest of our sinful species. To think that there is power within ourselves to cure the ills of this fallen world. To believe that we have no need of the salvation which others cling to in their desperation. Isn’t that exactly what has come to summarise the 21st Century average Joe’s response to the gospel? “I live a good enough life...I don’t need your saviour...I’ll make it on my own.”
That was what John dealt with for years, day in, day out. He may even have fallen prey to it himself on occasion. I mean, come on, who was doing better evangelistic work that this guy? He was getting new conversions every day. No one else was preaching this message as effectively, and this guy was actually changing the popular culture of the day. I’m sure that at least once or twice he said to himself “Man, if I could just clone myself I’d save everybody in the world.” You get the idea.
But...what defined Jesus? Was it His arrogance or His pride? Was it His dumbfounding, supernatural powers? Was it His general aura of being better than everyone else?
There’s no escaping the conclusion – Jesus was entitled to all this. Jesus was actually better than us – He still is for those that may be wondering – and while humanity’s pride is an ugly and ridiculous sign of our hopelessness, Jesus could have Lorded over everyone without any qualms, and He would have been right to do so.
So the idea that He comes to John to be ‘cleansed’ is completely baffling.
When John sees Jesus stepping into the water, I bet he would have just about blown his mind out of confusion. Vs. 14 “I need to be baptised by you, and do you come to me?” In other words, “Uh, cus’, isn’t this whole thing a bit pointless for you? You’re about as close to God as it’s possible to get. In fact, I’d like some of what you’ve got going on there!” Jesus didn’t need to be reconciled to God because He’d never been unclean, so John’s right – the ritual of being cleansed through baptism was meaningless to Him.
So...why, Jesus?
Vs. 15 “It is proper for us to do this to fulfil all righteousness.” No, sorry...I still don’t get it. The bible says that John consented, but, I still didn’t understand why. To fulfil all righteousness. Whose righteousness? Jesus? I think we’ve already established that He’s pretty righteous. So what is He talking about?
It can only be one thing...humanity’s righteousness; our righteousness.
Jesus baptism had nothing to do with a human ritual having any effect on Jesus, but about Jesus affecting this human ritual. Jesus reply to John was to say “In order to save you all, I have to be one of you. Totally, unreservedly and completely identified as and with this broken humanity.”
It was unthinkable – absurd, even. The Jews would have thought it the utmost of offense: that their Holy One of Israel would make Himself into a filthy, lowly, ordinary human creature? The whole idea was a slap in the face of their traditions and their worship. God was perfect; holy; entirely separate from humanity. And He deserved to be so.
But Jesus was focused entirely on one thing: He was abandoned to His mission. Save humanity. Do whatever it takes. No matter the cost.

I begin to realise why I would never save the church from the doctrine of baptism. Because as long as anything is about “me”, it’s only ever going to lead to more sin, more brokenness and more division.
When Jesus stood before John, when He stepped into the water, when he immersed himself in the Jordan, He was saying “I will be one of you. I will live how you live. I will worship how you worship.
...I will be humble as you will be humble.”

Jesus was baptised in order to immerse Himself in our sin and muck and brokenness and humanity, so that we would know that He is just like us. He was baptised so that He could identify with us.
So what does it take to be a righteous human?
It seems that humility would be a really great place to start.
When Jesus completed his work on the cross, a curious transformation occurred in this divisive ritual. It went from being the symbol of people trying to make themselves clean, so that they could think they could claim God’s righteous nature, to becoming the symbol of humanity humbling themselves before Jesus, laying down our pride, our humanity, our very selves so that we would stop pursuing that which furthers our Self...and becoming like Jesus instead.
Jesus was baptised to identify with humanity. Now we are baptised to identify with Jesus.

Some approach baptism as just a ritual – simply as one of the things you do, one of the boxes you tick, to be a good little Christian and get into heaven. Their pride has kept their Self as the most important thing in life.
Some approach it thinking that this act in and of itself will usher people into God’s kingdom – and they insist that their family members be baptised so that they can all go to heaven together. Their pride has kept Self as the most important thing in life.
Some disregard baptism, suggesting that the act is a meaningless ritual, and that it is the decision of the heart that matters. That’s pride – a person is not willing to humble themselves to the example of Jesus. Their Self still dictates their lives.
When people argue about how baptism should be done, or when it should be done, or if it needs to be done, they are disregarding the core element of what it’s all about.
To shed the Self...and to be like Jesus.
Who’s humble enough for that?

Un-undead

2010-12-12T20:08:00.000-08:00

Those of you who have followed my journey for a while will know that when I move to Small Town VIC, things haven't turned out quite the way I expected. God doesn't seem to be interested in meeting my expectations so much as shattering the comfortable little boxes I like to build for myself to live in.

Those of you who have been a mentor or leader for me in ministry through the years are probably shrugging your shoulders and saying, "Yeah. Haven't you learned by now?"

Well...no. So *pppfffftthhhhtttt*

I don't lay claim to getting much more mature either, I suppose.

Seriously, this has been a year that one just could never plan to have. And while I'll admit to being underwhelmed by what I first saw when I walked into this town a little over twelve months ago, God has revealed to me that, much like a certain species of Robot's in Disguise...there is more than meets the eye.

El Firo once recounted to me a story of how he had, for a season, been a leader in a church which had been a part of a denomination that in his eyes was past their use by date. God's response to him was a very pointed slap in the face: "Don't you ever call my bride 'dead'." A Canadian fella I once heard preach spoke about Ezekial 37, and very succinctly managed to sum up the bulk of God's work in this present world. "God" he said, "is in the resurrection business."

I am so glad to be living in that place right now.

Resurrection isn't always attractive. Just read John 11. Resurrection sometimes stinks. It's weird. It's abnormal. It's uncomfortable. As humans, we hate to deal with loss and the pain of grief...but we're just not capable of 'dealing' with resurrection. Maybe that's what makes it so valuable: when the Holy Spirit is Waking the Dead inside of us, we are forced to let Him entirely have His way, 'cause we just don't have a clue as to what the hell is going on.

Nothing (and I am beginning to understand that there really is nothing) is beyond God's ability to resurrect. This year, this has been true of myself, but more than that it has been true of others around me. God has brought back to life in me things that I had long thought dead - dreams, passions, skills, goals.
But it has been far more exciting for me to watch as God has brought back from the dead two lives, and a relationship, before the eyes of my whole church...at least those who are bothered to watch.

Romans 12:2 - "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will."

Having met these people, and watched them come to know Jesus, know their own desperation, know His salvation, and experience His transformation has been the single greatest encounter of my years of ministry (so far). I have met far too many Weekend-Sport Christians who have refused to let God do what He desires to do in their lives. Far too many Wounded Christians who hold onto their hurt and resentment and refuse to let God use that to make them into powerful servants. I had almost come to believe that maybe the best the church could hope for was one or two level headed leaders, and a handful of struggling servants who will one day limp past the finish line.

It doesn't have to be that way.

The power of the gospel, and of The Holy Spirit, is ever-present to irrevocably transform entire lives to be more like Jesus. I've seen it...and it looks pretty good. There is no good thing that He cannot bring back from the dead. Yes, it's uncomfortable. Yes, it can hurt. Yes...it often stinks, at first. But it means that we are transforminging this world...and isn't that the real goal? It definitely beats a church full of the Walking Dead.

There's too many zombie movies out there anyway...

So, to my very own Mr. & Mrs. Superhero, this ones for you guys. God's Spirit is like Air - KEEP BREATHING.

Zizi out.

Reflecting

2010-12-05T20:31:00.000-08:00

The year has passed - I'm still here.

Tasks are quick - relationships take time.

Inception...what a dangerous idea.

Work is easy - Ministry is hard.

Hurt sucks - Hope is better.

I'd rather not stay away from my family - but if I have to be away from my family, I'll make my family bigger.

"Twilight" isn't that bad - It's also not that good.

God is good, all the time; and...you know the rest.

Anyone want to save the world? Well guess what: so do I. But it's not us that's going to do it.

Laughter is a good medicine, but it's not the best.

I've grown up - how the hell did that happen?

I love pesto.

What am I willing to give up for the kingdom?

What am I willing to take up for the kingdom?

I'm not finished yet.

I...talk too much.

Time to step up.

Truth & Love (3 John)

2010-10-10T02:12:00.000-07:00

We believe in Marx, Freud and Darwin
We believe everything is OK
as long as you don't hurt anyone
to the best of your definition of hurt,
and to the best of your knowledge.

We believe in sex before, during, and
after marriage.
We believe in the therapy of sin.
We believe that adultery is fun.
We believe that sodomy’s OK.
We believe that taboos are taboo.

We believe that everything's getting better
despite evidence to the contrary.
The evidence must be investigated
And you can prove anything with evidence.

We believe there's something in horoscopes
UFO's and bent spoons.
Jesus was a good man just like Buddha,
Mohammed, and ourselves.
He was a good moral teacher though we think
His good morals were bad.

We believe that all religions are basically the same-
at least the one that we read was.
They all believe in love and goodness.
They only differ on matters of creation,
sin, heaven, hell, God, and salvation.

We believe that after death comes the Nothing
Because when you ask the dead what happens
they say nothing.
If death is not the end, if the dead have lied, then its
compulsory heaven for all
excepting perhaps
Hitler, Stalin, and Genghis Kahn

We believe in Masters and Johnson
What's selected is average.
What's average is normal.
What's normal is good.

We believe in total disarmament.
We believe there are direct links between warfare and
bloodshed.
Americans should beat their guns into tractors .
And the Russians would be sure to follow.

We believe that man is essentially good.
It's only his behavior that lets him down.
This is the fault of society.
Society is the fault of conditions.
Conditions are the fault of society.

We believe that each man must find the truth that
is right for him.
Reality will adapt accordingly.
The universe will readjust.
History will alter.
We believe that there is no absolute truth
excepting the truth
that there is no absolute truth.

We believe in the rejection of creeds,
And the flowering of individual thought.

If chance be
the Father of all flesh,
disaster is his rainbow in the sky
and when you hear:

State of Emergency!

Sniper Kills Ten!

Troops on Rampage!

Whites go Looting!

Bomb Blasts School!

It is but the sound of man worshipping his maker.

(Steven Taylor)
-----------------------------------------------

The gospel according to the world; the Creed of the contemporary. The great lie that popular philosophy would have you believe: Truth is relative.

Can we hope to ever contest this philosophy?

The world is waiting to see if our words and our actions will coincide, and they’re going to wait to see it working on us before they give it a try for themselves.
And as we have heard from the words of John the Revelator, God has called us to love one another, and how do we love one another? In truth.

John’s first principle of truth and love is this: The believer’s life belongs to the church.
(vs. 5) “Dear friend, you are faithful in what you are doing for the brothers, even though they are strangers to you. They have told the church about your love.”
The practice of the apostles was to continually send believers all over the world to preach, just as they were sent themselves. They were sent with the clothes on their back, the shoes on their feet and the gospel in their hearts – that was it. It was up to the church to provide for these itinerant preachers wherever they went. Although they may have never met before, Gaius warmly and lovingly took them into his home and gave them food and lodging while they preached in his city.
This is a continuation of the principle established by the church in the very beginning. Acts 2:44 says “All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.”
Gaius home and food and time were not his own. It did not matter that these strangers popping up out of the blue might have inconvenienced him – they didn’t have text messages back then. He was ready to open his life to receive anyone who had need, for the sake of the truth which these men and women would proclaim.

“I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to be first, will have nothing to do with us.”
The problem that most fear to experience in our own church: the pursuit of power by an individual.
This Diotrephes had managed to put himself into such a position in the church that he could almost single handedly decide who spoke and who didn’t. He could force people out of the church for disagreeing with him. He had decided that the church should have nothing to do with the first followers of Jesus, and had forbidden anyone to speak with them.

From this we learn the second principle of truth and love: Grace. I love that it always comes back to Grace. “Do not to imitate what is evil but what is good.”
…just keep loving, as you have been loving your brothers and sisters in the truth. Love Diotrephes.
This may have some uncomfortable applications for us. I’m sure we can all think of people whom have hurt us in the past. I’m sure we can all think of people that do not demonstrate a Godly character. There are people whom we would rather have nothing to do with. Some people do these things secretly, others blatantly in the open.
John says: “Let it be.”
There will, for all of these people, come a time when they will receive what is coming to them. But for right now, let it be. Your words against them are hardly likely to enact change in them. Your love might.

This is one of the biggest traps that we fall into as Christians. Not necessarily that we engage in conflict with one another, but that we tend to deal poorly with issues that trouble us. Rather than consult with an authority that can provide a solution, we grumble. Rather than seek out an individual to resolve a conflict, we settle for avoiding them for as long as we can.
It is easier to curse the darkness than to shine a light.
By Grace, we need to change our hearts and our attitudes and combat lovelessness with love.

John ends his letter with this: “I have much to write to you, but I do not want to use pen and ink. I hope to see you soon, and we will talk face to face.” The third principle of truth and love is right here: Get personal.
We live in an instant culture, where we can instantly send a faceless message anywhere in the world. We can communicate important information without having to hear a voice in the blink of an eye – or the push of a button. But is that really love?
John’s heart for the church should be our own. He couldn’t wait to spend time with these people. Why would he want to avoid contact with them? He loved them! We too need to get personal with one another if we are to be a church of truth and love. When we are face to face, understanding comes so much faster. When we are face to face it is much harder to feel unloved. When we are face to face it is difficult to believe that we are alone.

Our lives are not our own, they belong to the church.

We must live out Grace to one another.

We must get personal.

That’s the church that will reach the world for Christ.

Truth & Love

2010-10-03T19:43:00.000-07:00

John describes himself, in the words of his gospel, as “The disciple whom Jesus loved.” While we may scrunch our faces and say “Didn’t Jesus love everybody equally?” there was, it seems, a singular bond between Jesus and John. There are four words in the Greek language for “love”, and each has a different meaning of the word we over-use today. Eros is the word from which we derive erotic, and refers to sexual attraction. Philia refers to the connection and loyalty forged between friends. The love of Jesus towards John is Agape, "True Love", which also refers to the way one demonstrates their love or affection for another. At the Last Supper, that final meal Jesus shared with his closest friends before he was executed, we are shown a glimpse of this Agape. John 13:23 says that at this meal “One of them, the disciple whom Jesus loved, was reclining next to him.” This is possibly the only time you will ever hear me say these words, but the King James Version translates this verse better as “Now there was leaning on Jesus' bosom one of his disciples, whom Jesus loved.”
Not sitting on chairs upright and stiff, but lounging on their sides or elbows around a table: that’s how Jews ate their meals. And this one disciple was close enough to Jesus, that as they reclined, John could lay his head on Jesus shoulder, or against his chest – just as I would have done to my dad when I was younger, before I stopped kissing him in public and making him drop off at school around the corner where the other kids couldn’t see.
John had no such qualms about displaying his love for Jesus, nor did Jesus have any reservation in reciprocating. John, more than any of the other New Testament writers, had a unique and wonderful experience of the love of God – he experienced that which we often today feel is so elusive: The affectionate love of Jesus; a hug; a touch on the cheek; a kiss. So much so, that God’s love comes to be a dominating theme in all his works of scripture.

Where love is concerned, truth can often take a backseat. Our idea of love suggests that we withhold judgement; we don’t critisise; we make allowances for the shortcomings of others, so that they will know that they are loved in spite of their failings. We do these things why? Because it’s what we want for ourselves. As much as we say that constructive criticism is a good thing, I don’t actually want to hear it. I don’t mind if people disagree with me, as long as they don’t say anything about it to me. No husband will tell his wife that she looks anything but perfect when she asks, regardless of the circumstances that may- …I’ll stop right there.
Our understanding of love compels us to tell the little white lies on occasion to spare people feeling hurt – or massive lies to cover a situation that we think they’re not capable of dealing with. For us, love justifies our dishonesty.

For John, love could only justify truth. If people held poor attitudes towards one another, if people had misunderstandings with one another, if there was confusion about the scriptures, if there were mixed teachings about Jesus, then John – in love – could not allow himself or anyone else to ignore these things. He spoke, and he spoke frankly, and directly, leaving no doubt that God loves each of his beloved creation, leaving no doubt that John himself loved his spiritual brothers and sisters, but refusing to leave them with the lies that they had built around themselves to feel comfortable.

John opens his dialogue with so beautifully: “To the chosen lady and her children, whom I love in the truth” (vs. 1). That greeting captures so much of John’s love for the church. She is special; she is beautiful; she is family; though separated by geography, they are never separated from his heart.
The children of the lady are those believers whom have come to know Jesus after the apostle’s established the churches. These are disciples whom John did not personally have a hand in converting, but whom he has met, and he is joyful that they are walking in truth – he is praising the chosen lady for her faithfulness in teaching others well, as a mother raises her children.

BUT…there’s always a but. You can feel it coming. There wouldn’t have been letters sent to the churches if there were no but’s.

What does John ask of his lady? Love one another. Sounds familiar? Sounds easy?

It’s not.

Loving one another is a big deal and it costs, and it’s uncomfortable, and we won’t always want to do it because…it’s hard. But this is how John tells us we are to love one another: “that we walk in obedience to (God’s) commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.”

As Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes “there is nothing new under the sun” – the history of the church has always had a cyclic nature so that we are constantly returning to the sins and failures of our past, we just fool ourselves into thinking that we’re getting it right because our society looks different. This was the big problem in churches then, and it’s the big problem in churches now – it’s the problem of false teaching.

If we teach false doctrine, or allow false doctrine to thrive, we do not love one another.

This was that lovelessness was for John. The church of this time had been infiltrated by a philosophy known as gnostisism. The Gnostics were a cult who believed in God, and in the divinity of Jesus, but bought into a very Greek understanding of self which said that Spirit is good, and Flesh is bad. We as individuals are inherently good beings, our Spirit’s are only encased in the evil of our bodies which causes us to sin. They taught that Jesus was never a man in flesh, but only took the form of a man to communicate. (vs. 7) “Many deceivers, who do not acknowledge Jesus Christ as coming in the flesh, have gone out into the world.” Flesh is repulsive to God, they would say, and God would have nothing to do with it, so if we are to be more like God, we must ignore the wants and the needs of our own bodies.
It doesn’t take hours of searching the bible to learn that this is complete rubbish. The gospels say it over and over – Jesus was a man who hungered, he got thirsty, he got tired, he felt pain, and more than that it was necessary for him to be fully man in order to be the sacrifice for humanity’s sin. It is also clear that Jesus did not disregard the flesh of people he encountered, but he healed the sick and lame, and fed those who were hungry – this was how he loved people. And here comes a cult who seem to believe almost everything that we believe, and say most of the right words, and have read the same scriptures, but make that one, ever so slight, change and then begin to replicate that false doctrine through the church. (vs. 7) “Any such person is the deceiver and the antichrist.”

It would mean the end of charity, because flesh doesn’t matter. It would mean the end of shared meals, because flesh doesn’t matter. It would mean the end of comfort in times of pain, because pain is flesh and…you get it.

But more than this – much, much worse than this – is the lovelessness that comes from allowing others to believe and submit to false teaching. Because that teaching leads people away from God, not closer to him – and allowing people to walk away from God without realizing that they are is allowing them to walk blindly into hell, with no way of knowing that that’s where they’re headed.

That. Is. Not. Love.

I hear it from the church today:
All religions are basically the same, I just happen to have chosen Christianity, but we will all see heaven.

No.

I’m basically a good person, and that’s all I need to be to get to heaven.

No.

I’ve been baptized, I take communion and that’s why I’m going to heaven.

No.

The commands of the bible are the past; I can behave as I want as long as I don’t hurt anyone.

No.

Truth and Love – none of us would be loving each other if we didn’t challenge each other in TRUTH. This is why I do what I do: I love people. I love young people, I love all people, and I desperately want to see them know and love God the way I do. So many of them don’t, and they have no idea that they are even separated, because they don’t understand the TRUTH that the church should have been teaching them in LOVE.

I’m sure John felt the same. He tells the church first: “Love one another – and this is love: walk in obedience to God.” We can only walk in obedience to God if we walk, as the children of the chosen lady walked, in truth.

The truth is how we love each other, and how we together are to love a lost and dying world.

Amazed to be expected

2010-09-29T22:57:00.000-07:00

When am I gonna learn?

So, I know - a bunch of you out there are saying to yourselves "Lindsay, we've been wondering when you're gonna learn for years." Yeah, well...pffttthhhppp.

That...that's me blowing a raspberry. You get it? It's...like with all the noise...

...damn, you just can't type *raspberry*. It doesn't work in text. When am I gonna learn?!??!

Ok. Context.

I'm really annoyed right now, because last week was awesome. No, scratch that. Not awesome. AWESOME! It was an epic of epic epicness (thank you Scott Pilgrim). The camp to...begin all camps. Our first camp.
I was directing and speaking, and that meant I talked A LOT. How everyone got through the week listening to me I'll never understand because I was so sick of myself by Thursday (that's seriously not me fishing for compliments or positive reinforcement Sam...I was genuinely sick of my own voice). We had 12 of our young people (good number) and were joined by the Fantastic Five from St. Paul's in Castle Hill (never be able to thank you enough). We played together, ate together, got messy together and talked God together.

And do you know what God went and did...He answered every single prayer for the camp and showed up to touch everyone who went! Seriously, Everyone! How am I supposed to complain about how difficult ministry is if God shows up and actually does stuff!?

See, my issue is this: The Holy Spirit has this annoying tendency to match my (our) expectations. I don't expect much, so I rarely see Him deliver much, and it's worked out pretty well so far.
Then I go and do a camp for 12 young people and get a team of 16 people to run it, then get my church to pray for it, then get people declaring that God's going to work in a great way over the week - and they all get the expectation level raised up, and The Holy Spirit delivers. If He does stuff like this, I'm going to have to *shudder* change my expectations.

I read something like John 14:14...and I just think 'that's too big.' For whatever reason, God seems so much more palatable when He's reigned in; on a leash; in a box. I mean, how can I ever be sure that my carefully constructed plans will come together if I can't keep God in His place...eh?

In the meantime my youth start saying things like "I want to put my faith out there more", "I want to know God more", and the ever terrifying "What else can God do?!"

Maybe I need to rethink my amazement with the Holy Spirit, and be a little more expectant. After all, He did deliver a pretty awesome camp.

And the food wasn't half bad either.

Expect me when you see me...

"How have you loved us?"

2010-09-12T16:15:00.000-07:00

I. Have. Loved. You.

When the God of creation speaks – things tend to happen. Like world’s tend to be created. City walls tend to fall down. Dead people tend to come back to life. The One of infinite power, and he has this message for us: “I have loved you.”

Victor Hugo wrote “The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves – say rather, loved in spite of ourselves.” He was talking of the love of another person – how much more should the love of the Lord of All fill us with joy?

It might, if we believed it.

It’s not a new question. It’s not an old fashioned question. It’s not an antiquated question. It’s not even a really old question.
It’s an ancient question. And the first people to ask it were God’s people. “How have you loved us?” They asked. “Look at where we are! Our nation is in shambles; we have been attacked and persecuted by every kingdom under the sun; our farms are dry; our people are weak. How have you loved us?”

The book of Malachi is God’s answer to that question.
I think this is a case where God didn’t want anyone getting the message caught up with the messenger. Who Malachi was is not important (his name means, literally, “My messenger”) – what he had been given to say was life-changing. It spoke right to the hearts of God’s people, and addressed their greatest fear: That God didn’t love them anymore.

So He tells them: I am the Lord your God. You can doubt me. You can ignore me. You can forget me. You can even walk away from me. But I will not leave you believing that you are not loved.

He tells His people: “I have loved you.”

Is there any reason to believe that God isn’t loving? I’ve met many Christians that say “I’m just feeling so separate from God right now.” They don’t feel His love, they can’t hear His voice, they can’t worship Him because He is so distant. Something must be wrong, and God must have taken off. I hurt, so God must have left me.
Every time a disaster of some kind is in the news the question comes up again? Why would a loving God let a country get flooded? Why would a loving God let our house burn? Why would a loving God let our child die?
When it comes to our daily trials our pain becomes the test of God’s devotion.
We have caught up the idea of God’s love with conditions that we would never have placed on our parents. When a teenager says “If you really loved me you’d let me do what I want” we would all acknowledge that they are just being a teenager – that what they want is probably the last thing that they should be doing. It’s because the parents love their child that they would discourage them from these things. And if the child does it anyway and gets hurt, do we blame the parents?

But we blame God.

I don’t think God can take that.

So He answers the question “How have you loved us?”
“Was not Esau Jacob’s brother?” The Lord says, “Yet I have loved Jacob, but Esau I have hated.”

When we read the Bible there are things that we need to keep in mind about language and translation and symbols and the meanings of names – things that we don’t have to think about when we read the paper, or a Tom Clancy novel or the latest issue of Superman.
For a start the ancient Israelites didn’t have words for “prefer”, or a way to say “love you more than them”. Jesus said in Luke 14:26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother…he cannot be my disciple.” It’s not hate in the way we mean hate. Jesus said there simply that if you come to Him then He must come first. Jesus is to be the priority above all else. And in Malachi, God says to His people not “I love some and I hate others”, but “I chose Jacob first.”

God’s people are often addressed by the names of their ancestors. Jacob was the Father of a nation, and that nation carried His identity. So when God says “I chose Jacob” what is He saying? “I chose you all, My people.”
When He speaks of Esau he does not talk about one man, but about anyone who was not one of His people. It’s not just a simple matter of God beating up on people whom He doesn’t like either. The choice for Israel is one that the people responded to. They said “Yes, we will be God’s people. That will be our identity.” The rejection of Edom was every bit as much the reaction of the people, “We will stand against God and His people. We don’t want Him.” Esau, or the people of Edom, were a people divided. Once they might have been a nation, but no more. They had fought wars and lost – they had been driven from their homes and plundered. As a nation, they did not survive.

Pain and hardship befalls all people. If God’s own children (that’s us, by the way) feel separate from Him, they only need to look at other nations, or other faiths. No-one is immune from the pain of living – and so it is not an adequate measure of God’s love.

What does it mean to turn to God? What would be required of us? What happens when we let our pain drive into the arms of God? These are important questions. But before we go to those questions, we must start by knowing this: In all things, God proceeds from a position of love. That is the beginning of this book, it is the heart of His being and it is the inextricable truth of our lives. And all the pain, and all the anguish, and all the loneliness sucks. Yes, it sucks. But we come to an understanding of it best when we start with the understanding that God loves us. When we start to change our question from “How could God love us when He lets these things happen?” to “How does God love us through this pain that we endure?”.

My sister lost a child not two months ago. She and my Brother-in-law move on with life, because mercilessly life does not wait for them to deal with their grief – they have to carry it with them. And some days the pain is less, and on some days it seems that no time at all has passed since the doctor gave them the terrible news that he could no longer find their child’s heartbeat.
But I have watched, with amazement, their pain and anguish drive them deeper and deeper into the loving arms of God. And I have watched as they have grieved with the knowledge that they are not abandoned, and that has brought them hope, and joy in the midst of their sorrow. Ask them today, and they will tell you that know God so much more – they know His reality for a fact – because He has carried them through their pain.

C.S. Lewis once highlighted the wonderful use that God has for pain. “I’m not so sure that God wants us to be happy” he said, “But I am convinced that He wants us to love, and to be loved.” On pain he says “It is the megaphone through which God rouses a deaf world.”
Where do we turn when we hurt? To the ones who love us…or to our own bitter loneliness? That’s our choice. And all the comfort and peace and gifts and compassion we receive from the ones we’re closest to…pale into insignificance when we ask God to take our hand through the pain.

Once we start with this, we’ll be ready for the rest of the story.

(From Malachi 1:1-5)

Why Hope?

2010-08-09T17:12:00.000-07:00

for Brony & Mick

A lot of people have been asking me of late "How are you doing?"

I smile a lot and nod my head, and say things like "Good, good", or "Not bad". "Yeah, good actually" is a favorite response, though if I'm feeling particularly deep I'll say "As well as I can be."

I do not doubt the sincerity of the people asking - these are my friends and family - and I don't want to be overly casual or dismissive in my response. But in the end, all I've got are words...and for one who aspires to being a writer, I find myself too often disappointed with the inadequacy of words. The inadequacy to express what we are really feeling. The inadequacy to explain the complexity of our emotions. The inadequacy to state that we are presently suffering, but that's where we need to stay right now.

We experience tragedy, we lose someone we love, and all people can generally come up with is a weak-sounding "So...how are you doing?"

I think we want to be able to say more. Not simply using more words, but to say the words that will take away the pain, and restore peace to the spirit. To teach the insight that will make everything better. To answer that all-consuming question that we just know would make things easier to bear: "Why?"
We can't explain why we don't have those words. We can't explain why we don't have that insight. In general, we can't explain "Why?"...

But that's ok, because I can't explain why I don't care about "Why?"

I don't think anyone really cares about "Why?"

Consider: what good has the answer to that question ever really been? When your five year old asks "Why is the sky blue?" - will he even understand the answer? And say he does, two minutes later, will he care?
Why do we have to pay tax? Why do I like Dave Matthews and not Seether? Why does tomato from the garden taste better? Why do I have to endure hardship and pain? Why do bad things happen to good people?

I don't think we (humans) are built for "Why?". Just like that five year old, odds are high that we won't understand the answer even if God cared to give it. But say He did - for a moment let's hypothetically say that God answered one "Why?". Would the answer change anything about our lives? Would the answer mean anything? Really? How?

God has never really dealt in "Why?". After all Job went through God just told him that he would never understand.

When I consider this, and I watch my family in these past few weeks, I find an enormous sense of freedom and peace in this. Because, setting aside the fact that we aren't meant for it, "Why?" has the potential to rob us of our Joy. "Why?" runs the risk of depriving us of our comfort. "Why?" could take away our Hope. Because if we need to know "Why?" the mundane, or the bad things happen, we need to know "Why?" we should be okay with it. We need a reason "Why?" we can be still in the middle of life's storms. And as I've already said, words are woefully inadequate at this kind of thing.

But Hope has no "Why?". Hope needs no "Why?". As my sister and brother-in-law have taught me, when the storm hits, those of us who love Jesus are incapable of anything except Hope. I doubt any of us have the words to explain it - and we wouldn't want to if we did.

Hope doesn't need words.

Hope is.

And between the storms...Hope waits.

"Now our faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of what we do not see." (Heb. 11:1)

The Parable Has the Wrong Title

2010-06-27T23:50:00.000-07:00

I once heard of how a pastor was trying to give a different perspective on the story of the Prodigal son, and he relates the tale: how the younger, brash and worldly son takes his inheritance early, and throws it away on beer and nachos and computer games and small cups of coffee that are ridiculously expensive; he ends up in the middle of a global financial crisis…or a famine, whichever one sounds more devastating to you; he goes to work on a pig farm where he slaves all day just to get a beating at night if he’s lucky; he comes to his senses and goes home to seek forgiveness; he walks home across the Mediterranean sea; drags himself up the driveway to his house; then wanders all over the four hundred acre property till he finds his dad; goes up to him and says “I know I messed up bad, and I don’t deserve a thing from you. Would you take me on like a hired hand and let me come back?” The father looks at him for a moment and says, “Well, let’s see here. You took a full half of the estate when you left, that’s (does a quick bit of maths in his head) so…if you want back you’ll be here full time for the next forty two years, no holidays and no leave, till you’ve worked off every last cent. Got it?”
And just as the pastor pauses for dramatic effect and is about to make his point, the voice of an older lady from up the back of the church floats forward saying, “Now that’s how Jesus should have ended the story!”

This parable is, of course, on of those that most any Christian could recite in their sleep. And it’s a wonderful tale of forgiveness, and even people who don’t follow Christ would say that it has a pretty darn good moral. But Jesus point was not about offering some comfort to the sinners he ate with.
For all that this parable teaches us about God’s grace for sinners, it is every bit as much about God’s grace for his faithful. That woman who cheered the more cynical version of the story speaks with the voice of the Pharisees who muttered back in verse 2 “This man welcomes sinners, and eats with them.” And so Jesus response is to tell them this story and at the end challenge their hard hearts by asking them “Does your religion really make you closer to God?”

Something that I’ve noted about sermons on the Prodigal Son is that a great many of them stop at the moment the young son returns to the father. In fact, some childrens bibles don’t even bother to tell the rest of the story – how the elder brother gets wind of the return of the punk, and gets real huffy and refuses to go inside; has a good sulk; and the father has to come out and explain why the return of his brother is a good thing. Maybe some preachers figure that Christians don’t need to hear that part of the story. But Jesus needed to let everyone know that everything he gives to the faithful, he gives to the sinner.
And everything the sinner enjoys when they come home, the faithful can enjoy every single day.

What’s the problem that the older son has? His no-good, two-timing, flake of a brother – and he doesn’t even want to be that associated with him anymore, he calls him “this son of yours” in verse 30…(it’s like when your kids have really done something bad, you call in your spouse and say “Look what your children have done!”) – has taken half of the property. Half of everything the father owned. Think about what it means to take a full half of everything you have. Sell your house and split the cash, or else sell everything you have until you have equivalent cash, that’s what this kid brother took from the family. And now that he’s wasted it all, everything that’s his, he is coming home, and the father is doing what? He puts a ring on his finger, and shoes on his feet, and a robe to wear - but where is that coming from? By all rights, it belonged to the older brother. The kid had his share – he took it and spent it and now it’s gone. Everything that’s left belongs to the older brother; the one who will treat it right; the one who will be responsible. The father is taking away from his future. No wonder he’s upset.

But what about the father?

What has the father been to his sons, but a cheque waiting to be cashed in?

The younger son was unashamed about that. He demanded his money, took it, and spent it having a great old time. The older brother? He wore a mask of duty and servitude. He fitted himself with responsibility and pride – that no-one could find fault with him. And when the time came for him to take his share of the inheritance…he will have earned it.

But he didn’t care about his father, any more than he cared about his brother.

Do we still see that attitude in church today?

That’s the point that Jesus was making to his friends, his company of sinners, his contemporaries in religion, his brothers the Pharisees – and to all of us who would call ourselves His followers. This is not about how the younger brother treats his father. It’s not about how the older brother treats the younger brother.
It’s about the Father lavishing His love on His sons, because He can’t bear to be apart from them. And we see ourselves in the response to the Father’s love. The older brother only cared that he get what was his, what he had earned, what he had a right to. He lived near the father, but he didn’t live close to his father.
What Jesus was saying to the Pharisees was “You think you have a problem with these sinners…but you’ve got to understand that the problem is that you’re not even close to God. All your ritual, your religion, your obedience, your discipline…it’s nothing. Because you have no relationship with your heavenly father. In that regard, you have everything in common with these people.”

How about you?

Some of us have had our own prodigal experience, some of us would have a harder time defining that. Some of us have known Jesus in only recent years, some have grown up going to church our whole lives. What we all have in common now is that we choose, now, to call God our God. We have all been sinners, and we have all been saved by grace through Jesus.
But are we treating God as a resource for eternity? Have we come to Him to receive our eternal life, and then left Him in the corner of our rooms? Have we got just what we want from Him…and that’s all we cared about?

Like the Pharisees that Jesus spoke with, if all we want from God is eternal life, and some nice platitudes on Sunday…then our lives are an exercise in missing the point. And none of us wants to hear that – none of us want to think that. Every single one of us that comes into this building on Sunday wants to feel as though their faith is meaningful and worthwhile…and in the end, only you can answer that for yourselves. All I can do is ask the questions.

Is God your Father…or just the guy who’s going to get you into heaven?

Do you care about life with God, right now…or just an afterlife when you’ll have to meet him?

Are your attitudes about money, charity and generosity the attitudes that He has shown you? Or are your things still your own?

Do the lost and the outcast and the rejects and the homeless and the socially awkward have a place at your table? Or should they go somewhere else?

Does your faith life bring you joy? Are you enriched by knowing God?

…or don’t you think about that much?

A Father had two sons…and neither one were interested in being his son, they just wanted the stuff that he had. One of them had to lose everything before he was willing to be family.
I wonder what the other has to lose?

What do we have to lose?

Letter to the Author

2010-06-17T18:28:00.000-07:00

I am Better than you.

You have resigned yourself to defeat - or worse, to never try.

I am victorious - you choose to wallow in despair and self-pity.

I choose the joy of the Lord as my strength.

You are weak.

So am I.

But your weakness makes you pathetic; my weakness makes His strength perfect.

You will live in fear.
I will overcome the world.
Because I am better than you.

You are lost and alone, and you despair that you must suffer this life.
I am found in Christ - I live in Him and He lives in me.

So cry; sulk; whimper and complain. Give up. Crawl into a hole. Just survive until you die. I am better than you.

...You have my face...

...You speak with my voice...

...But you are nothing.

I am in Christ...and I am better than you.

Z.

Lack of preparation...the mother of results

2010-06-08T16:48:00.000-07:00

We recently had a brand new kitchen installed at church. It's nice; nicely accessible cupboards; industrial dishwasher; a real coffee urn. I was there on the first day of construction...or destruction. To save cash on the whole process the guy running the project got a bunch of us in to tear the old kitchen out. It was a rare, cathartic moment for someone in full-time ministry - we don't often get to destroy things, much less in our own churches. So we get the whole thing broken to pieces in a couple of hours and I commented to Project Leader that he seemed well versed at this kind of thing. He casually replied: "Proper planning prevents poor performance."

As I wiped the spittle off my shirt I though, 'Man, how long has he been waiting to say that this morning?'

I can certainly see the wisdom in his words. After all, just about everything in life is about performance, and no-one wants a poor review. This seems life one of those proverbs that we can really build our lives on. There's just one problem...where does our criteria for 'poor performance' come from?

This past weekend The Team took the youth for 'Holy Ghost Stories' (see what I did there?) with young people from another church. It was actually the Holy Spirit Weekend from the Alpha Course, but instead of listening to Nicky Gumble all weekend, we decided to divvy up the talks amongst ourselves.
What is the hoped-for result from such an excursion? When we get back to church on Sunday, what do we want to be able to tell people? "The youth had a great time." I guess that's not bad - certainly didn't want them to be bored. "We stayed up all night!" I suppose that's a measure of success for a youth 'sleepover'. "We learned about the Holy Spirit." I'd want to hope so.

How about "We met the Holy Spirit"? How do you plan for that?

Truth is both myself and the leader of the other group had no idea what we were doing. We had poured in so much effort into getting people to the event; we hadn't spent much time planning our talks. We prayed - we were rushed, and a little panicked, and a lot desperate - that God would come up with something. And I was shown - again - a wonderful truth of God:

My poor planning did not affect His performance at all.

Something like that first Pentecost was happening instead. "When the day of Pentecost came, they were all together in one place." (Acts 2:1) All we had to do at that point was stay there, and Holy Spirit took care of the rest. We met Him in that house; the young people had an indescribable encounter; and I was a very happy man.

I'm glad God's not into performance reviews...for my sake.

He's just into me.

And you too.

Zizi out.

Returning after minimal demand...

2010-04-06T04:59:00.001-07:00

It's been a while, but the break's over. No more wasting time. No more lollygagging about. Enough tomfoolery. Time to get the show on the road - finish what I started. I mean seriously, finish what I started. This post was started months ago. I couldn't finish it. I was too scared. Too intimidated. Too...well, it all started with this.

"Don't try to be a man of success but be a man of value."
Albert Einstein.

Figure I don't need to tell you how smart Einstein is - after all, I'm sure you've seen the movie. I will instead simply share with you this: I don't like smart people. They know things that I don't know.

I wonder what it must be like to be someone like ol' Al. To be so far ahead of everyone else in the room that you can't really be challenged by people anymore. To wake up one morning and go "Wow...I'm my own role model" and "When I grow up I want to be...Me!"

I wonder what the world looks like from their perspective, because I'm constantly reminded that I'm not one of those people. I'm the guy standing in the room full of people who looks very intently at his drink for most of the night, because I can't hope to keep up with any of the conversations that are going on around me. Everyone's smarter; everyone's bolder; everyone has a better vocabulary than me, and they all seem happy to offer me advice on diction, pronunciation and syntax (...I don't even know what that is).

When I read, or hear someone talk about Matthew 25:14-30 I have only one thought: I'm the guy with just the one talent - and I'm surrounded by Ten Talent Superchristians. I know! It's petty and not true and God loves me and will use me no matter where I am or what I have. But really, don't tell me you haven't felt the same. When we size ourselves up against others working for God, how often do we feel as though, somehow, God may not quite be getting His value for money with us.
Y'know, the story's even worse in Luke (9:12-28). In that story everyone starts with the same amount of talents - it's just the returns that change from man to man. If that's the case, how do I feel now that I'm standing shoulder to...well, the top of my head...with guys who are obviously capable of so much more than I am?

Some mornings I wish I'd just stayed in bed.

And that's been not just a significant journey of the past seven months here in the 'Ville (seven!), but the past few years as well. I've landed time and again in churches where guys my own age, or younger, are world's ahead of me. They've got things sorted out in their lives. They're in "the zone" for Jesus and their "sweet spot" for ministry. And I'm stuck minimum wage, less educated, no real achievements to speak of...except maybe for that time I downed a full pot of coffee in three minutes then ran around in the snow till I couldn't feel my feet. That was pretty awesome.

But I'd like to share with you something that God told me just before I took this job - something that was a decision making revelation for me. God said Lindsay...(fully dramatic pause)...you think too small.
Now, at the time, I figured He meant that I was weighing up my personal dreams against my call to ministry, and that He intended for me to have both. I don't think that anymore.

Y'see, since being here, and being surrounded by the spiritual giants that I seem constantly drawn to, I realise that I really have been thinking too small. Too small about everything. I think too small about ministry, and what the role of a youth pastor should be in his community. I think too small about church, and what a community is capable of achieving if they are unified. I think too small about how many lives I can connect with. I think too small about what people are capable of when they're given an encouraging push.

I think too small about what God can do through me...at least I used to.

Being around bigger people, I'm starting to think bigger. I'm starting to see that there is very little difference between me and the giants. It's just that where I might say "I don't have it in me", they just ask "can I be a part of that?"
God's doing the work, whether we're in it or not. El Firo keeps telling me, figure out what He's doing and get on board.

Why does God surround me with people who make me feel small? Because I need to be shown how big I can be.

Probably you too.

Now let's go Save the World™

Zizi out.

Character

2010-03-21T14:21:00.000-07:00

Y’see, everyone at college was trying to bring their A game as Christians. We were all first years, though I was younger than most of the others whom I had classes with. But we all seemed to have something to prove, like we didn’t need the actual input of Bible College, we were just here because we needed that piece of paper that would tell everyone what we already knew: we were just as good, if not better, than the pastors running around already. So debates would crop up in class, and we students would start to go at it, disagreeing with other people’s “naive” understanding of biblical doctrine, taking it upon ourselves to correct the sometimes immature approach that people had towards scripture. Our lecturers would generally let this happen while they leaned back in their seat, folded their arms and watched like it was a game of cricket. That’s what Bible College is all about.
So one day we’re arguing about the issue of original sin, and how exactly it works, and what it means and what the bible says – and I had managed to touch a nerve of one of the older guys in the class (which was a class on pastoral counseling and had nothing to do with original sin anyway). And just at the point where our lecturer stepped in to settle everyone down and get back to teaching us how to listen, my opponent pulled a dismissive face, rolled his eyes, shook his head and said something to the effect of: “Well, I can’t expect you to understand. You’ll learn when you grow up.”

First year Bible College Lindsay was devastated, and turned to the front of the class biting back tears. Then very quietly, the guy sitting next to me scrawled something on a piece of paper and slid it gently towards my field of vision. It simply said: 1 Timothy 4:12. So I opened my bible and read, “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.” That guy was instantly my new best friend. And as I pondered that verse, and took God’s Word into my heart that day I told myself, “One day…I am gonna show that guy behind me who’s boss and this verse is the key!”

I made a mistake in reading that verse, and in reading much of Timothy, that took a number of years to correct. I read the verse “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young” and the rest may as well have been Greek. I took the view that when Paul wrote this letter, he was telling Timothy how other Christians, particularly in his church, should behave towards him, and act towards him. This was a letter about being a leader, and a leader is to be respected, and if anyone thinks of behaving other wise then…there’ll be a reckoning of Biblical proportions.
The problem is that this is not a letter that tells Christians how to treat their leaders, as much as pastor’s everywhere wish that would be the case. This is a letter that tells all Christians, but particularly leaders, how and why they must live with integrity.

Even as Paul instructs about teaching quite a bit in this chapter, his instruction in inextricably tied to the character of those who teach scripture. “The Spirit clearly says that in later times some will abandon the faith and follow deceiving spirits and things taught by demons. Such teachings come through hypocritical liars, whose consciences have been seared as with a hot iron.” His message to Timothy, and to us: Bad teaching comes from bad character.
In the early centuries of the church, there were monks who went out to desolate desert places to show how spiritual they were by torturing themselves. One never ate cooked food. Another stood all night leaning on a sharp rock so that it was impossible for him to sleep. Another neglected his own body and allowed it to become so dirty that bugs dropped dead from his body. They did this because they thought it would win favor with God and show everyone how spiritual they were. We often think that if we sacrifice something for God (such as the right to marry or to eat certain foods), then He owes us something. This is legalism at its worst; trying to manipulate God into giving us something. It’s essentially the idea that we can make God indebted to us, make Him our servant and make ourselves His master. And that is the teaching of demons; of deceiving spirits – why Paul uses such a strong statement to warn us about the nature of people who would turn our attention away from God’s Word, and onto things that are designed to exercise control.

Paul reminds us that we are not saved by our actions; we are not saved by our doctrines; we are certainly not saved by our pastors or teachers – verse 9 “This is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance…that we have put our hope in the living God, who is the Saviour of all men, and especially of those who believe.
The fact is that acting pious on Sunday doesn’t lead us or anyone to Jesus. Giving up television, or reading, or ice cream or coffee doesn’t lead us or anyone to Jesus. We meet Jesus where we accept the truth of His gospel, and then allow Him to decide how our character will form from that moment onward. And we can find a really, really useful guide here in scripture, for what that character will look like.

And why is it so important? Why does Paul call for us to demonstrate such great character to everyone we meet. Look at verse 15. “Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress.” Our characters need to be flawless, because people are watching. People are watching and waiting for us to show them that the whole Christian thing is just a lot of talk and a badge. People are waiting to point at us and say “You see? Those Christians are just as petty and selfish and arrogant and insufferable as anybody.” And when people see that, the name of Jesus suffers for it. And people don’t want to bother with even listening to what Jesus has to offer them, because it all looks so fake.
That’s what I didn’t get nine years ago when I first started to really take hold of scripture. Back then I acted as though Christianity were all about the right words – put them together in the right way, and you could get anyone to do anything. Non Christians will become saved, and Christians will follow your instructions, because you’re getting it right. But what I have slowly come to understand is that people care so much less about what I say than about who I am – about what they see me do.
So when I read 1 Timothy 4:12 I no longer see an instruction to the church on how they must treat their leaders. I read a plea to all Christians – because we all teach; we all influence others – that tells us “Don’t give people the opportunity to dismiss you because you act immaturely. Don’t let people disregard what you have to say, because they don’t like who you are. Instead set and example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”

What Paul is talking about in his letter is how our life of faith is our strongest witness to the people we meet. That which will mean the most to our communities and our families – that we are genuine about allowing our character to be shaped by God. It is why Paul exhorts Timothy – and pastors and leaders and Christians for all time – to teach well and to teach biblically, but he emphasizes so much more that we must be people of Godly character. What people see us doing, how they see us behaving, what they hear us gossiping about to each other, how they see us relate to one another – in bitterness or love – will be the testimony that will stay with them. Our lives will be the test against which people measure the gospel. A preacher called Alan Redpath once said “You might have a saved soul but a wasted life - but no believer should ever be content with such a place”. By the end of this part of his letter Paul isn’t concerned for Timothy’s salvation – Paul wants to see that Timothy’s genuine faith is passed onto others. And that’s the task of every Christian – making Disciples of Christ takes lives and it takes lifetimes. “Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.”

Resolved

2010-03-02T14:24:00.000-08:00

Man that's a great word isn't it?

Say it aloud. Go on, no one's gonna care. "Resolved".

Y'know, it's actually a great family of words there: Resolve; Resolute; Resolution. If I could invent a word I'd want it to grow up pretty and one day marry one of these words. I'd like my words to be part of the family of "Resolve".

Ah...resolve. What a great feeling.

There's nothing like the sense of certainty that comes from resolution. To wake up in the morning and resolve to go for a run, and then read your bible. Or to go to bed and resolve to be up at the crack of dawn to more fully tackle your day. To resolve to get these assignments done. To resolve to eat healthier food. To resolve not to drink instant coffee anymore. It just fills you with such a sense of accomplishment. Like when I had gotten through my morning preparations, and then resolved to sit down and write this...

...problem is, I resolved to write this post months ago. Like, at New Year's. So much for resolutions.

Isn't that so typical of this life? We put all of our hope and strength into resolving to get up early, to be smarter, to understand politics, to read a newspaper - and the instant we don't do any of these things (as if they have some kind of time limit on them) we dismiss them as clearly not being as important as we thought, otherwise we'd have made the time for them. Or, potentially, we spend hours kicking ourselves for not being disciplined enough and figure that clearly we're just not good enough people and there's no point trying to fight our own nature and can you hand me another Diet Coke?

The problem with resolve doesn't end at resolutions either. Take a look at the issues upon issues upon issues that keep people at each others throats; that destroy communities; that prevent us from getting healthy. These issues just won't resolve! Bad blood never seems to bleed away. When I try to bring about resolution, I only seem to manage resentment - on my part and on the others.

Why is it others can manage to completely turn their lives around, and I'm stuck eating cake for breakfast because I can never resolve to do a proper grocery run? My friend, the Wise Man, has made leaps and bounds at making positive changes in his life and he's even putting on the web for people to follow. I'd be petrified of telling people what I wanted to change 'cause I'd hate the inevitable weekly conversation that would arise going something like:

"So, Z, how are you doing with learning Chinese/Pottery/Contemporary Dance/Guitar Making?"

"Oh...(evasive, scrunched-up facial expression), I've just been really busy with...busyness. You know how it is. I'll get back to it as soon as I turn 29/school breaks for holiday/I finish watching Lost/the Global Financial Crisis resolves."

I mean, when everything else in my life stops being so important. But I somehow I don't think I get that luxury.

You know, Jesus resolved something once. In truth he's probably resolved many things in his existence, but I'm talking about one time in particular.

"As the time approached for him to be taken up to heaven, Jesus resolutely set out for Jerusalem." (Luke 9:51)

I think Jesus understood something about resolution that I've missed. Something that Wise Man has learned that I've kinda glossed over. I've reduced resolution to a series of tasks - wake up early; exercise; get through so much paperwork in a given day; make nice with the neighbors; bake a cake for my boss.
May be what I haven't grasped is that resolution was not meant to be so limited. Maybe what Jesus and Wise Man know - what I am starting to understand - is that resolution is part of the journey. To resolve something should be to look with a long-term perspective on things, and allowing myself to walk resolutely towards that end, failing and succeeding in equal measure along the way. Jesus had in mind his ultimate goal of saving the world from sin and death by hanging on the cross - not an easy plan, and one that would require a strong will to accomplish. But he set his sights on that goal long before he got there. His resolution was the culmination of a journey through life, and that journey was worth making time for - worth making allowances for. Wise Man has opened up his life for others to watch as he makes positive changes. He also understands that his goal is not to lose a kilo this week, or to read a book this week. His goal is to be a healthy man, physically, spiritually and mentally - these matters of kilos and books and all are just markers on the journey to his greater destination.

Today seemed like a good day to finally put this post out there. A birthday is like a New Year, just a little more personal. And I am resolved today. I am resolutely setting out for a greater place than today. And if tomorrow I wake up and don't jog, or eat muesli, or drink Nescafe blend 43? Whatever. Those markers do not change my destination.

So, here we go.

Yeah...great word.

Lindz. Somewhere.

See...Hear...Feel...

2010-01-31T13:40:00.000-08:00

Space, according to the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, is big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mindbogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the chemist, but that’s just peanuts to space. To be fait though, when confronted with the sheer enormity of the distances between the stars, better minds than mine have faltered. Some invite you to consider for a moment a peanut in Sydney and a small walnut in Johannesburg and other such dizzying concepts. The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy is not wrong about space, or about the terrifying size of objects in space.

Our sun has a diameter of approximately one million, three hundred and ninety two thousand kilometers – it could fit one hundred and nine planet earths. Traveling at the speed of light, which is approximately three hundred thousand kilometers per second, it would take us a little over four years to reach the nearest star to our own. That star is just one of approximately four hundred billion that make up the Milky Way galaxy. The Milky Way galaxy is approximately one hundred thousand light years in diameter, and one thousand light years thick. And because I knew it would matter to you I have calculated that in more Earthly terms: one light year is 9434880000000 kilometers; the diameter of the Milky Way is 943488000000000000 kilometers; Earth is 40,075.02 km in diameter. To get an idea of interstellar travel, you only need to circle this planet 23543045019066 times.

There could be as many as 170 billion galaxies, and that’s only in the observable universe. Man has been observing and mapping stars for ten thousand years. Science has been using methods to continue to probe further into space since 1781, and still there’s no end in sight. Our universe is magnificent. I encourage you at some point to find the web site for the Hubble telescope and take a look at the images that it has captured over the years. The galaxies and nebulae and stars are simply breathtaking.

David, King of Israel and man after God’s own heart, has this to say about space:

“The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard. Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the end of the world.”

In his time, David would have had no clue as to the vastness of which he wrote. It was vast to him, nonetheless, and brought him to his knees in awe of God’s work. Today, his words grow only more potent, more appropriate. With every step we take into space, we see a beautiful and apparently unending testament to a glorious creator. Every word we have ever used to describe and praise God seems so inadequate when we are faced with his sheer size and power. Even ‘indescribable’ is a weak word. There is nothing that can be said to describe the God who exists beyond our universe and gave us these wonders.
As human beings we relate firstly to what we see; we learn and understand often by looking or watching.
And this is how God has chosen to reveal himself to us, how he begins to communicate with us: using a language of magnificence that is not spoken, but seen. As we desire to come to know God, we can begin, as David did, by reflecting on the endless beauty of the stars in sky; the power and size of our sun; the wonder of his creation.

Of course, if it were that simple, then every human across the planet would be called Christian. Unfortunately man is fully capable of dulling creations glory with “rational thought”. Minds that are respected above the pursuit of God’s truth talk about big bangs and the expanding universe, and evolution and natural selection. I don’t intend to address those issues, other than to point out man’s ability to make the supernatural into something ordinary.
And, of course, this is why we are not left simply with what we can see, but we are made to hear.

“The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul. The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the Lord are radiant, giving light to the eyes.”

C.S Lewis once said of Psalm 19 “I take this to be the greatest poem in the Psalter and one of the greatest lyrics in the world.” I think it’s fantastic that the point of this psalm is demonstrated by the words of the psalm itself. That David in this psalm wishes to convey that God’s word is beautiful, and he uses beautiful words to say so.

In speaking of the law of the Lord, David is not limiting his praise and admiration to the books of the law – although those writings do have a primary importance for us as they did for Israel. David is expressing his thanks for the whole word of God. We know that the Holy Spirit was at work through the writers of every part of the Bible, and makes the scriptures themselves into a living, breathing text. Understanding this, when we read of God’s law, his ordinances, statutes and precepts, it can reflect on the whole of scripture. Every word we hear by which God has continued to make himself known to us.

Listen to the poetry; the raw emotion and longing of these words. David speaks of the word of the Lord reviving the soul; giving joy to the heart; giving light to the eyes. We know that he speaks of the scriptures, of the word revealed to man through the law, and the prophets, and the poetry, and the gospels, and the letters of the apostles.

Do you feel this way when you hear his word? Is God’s word more precious to you than gold? This psalm compares the works of God which we can see, to His word which we can read and hear for one reason: Because both his works and his word should bring us to our knees with wonder. Both works and word are beautiful beyond description.
The story told throughout the scriptures is a love story – God’s love for us. His word tells us that he carefully crafted our existence; that he has walked with us throughout history. His laws showed us how to live with one another, and set a standard for peace, kindness, charity, justice and love that no other culture has matched.
And Jesus – there is always Jesus. When we hear the story of Jesus, we know a love like nothing else. When we hear his words, we hear a challenge to be better than we ever believed we could be. When we hear the words of the apostles as they write to the early church, we realize that the call to follow God and the challenging words of Jesus, were not impossible tasks. We hear of the first steps in learning to become what God has created man to be.

The words of the Lord “are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey from the comb.” And this is the harmony between what we see and what we hear from the Lord. What we see introduces us to our God, and tells us about Him, and demonstrates his nature and character. What we hear introduces us to ourselves. Through his word God communicates not just about himself, but what he would like our nature and character to be. Will we listen?

I suppose what I want to know, really, is what happens to us when we listen? When we’ve seen and heard, what next? We respond, but how are we responding?

I want to know if we really feel anything at all.

When I read the final verses of this psalm, I read David’s words asking God to help him become blameless. That’s not so remarkable I guess, because the church has been telling people to do the right thing for centuries now. I’m used to that. But here, in this psalm, David is asking for forgiveness from his “hidden faults”, and to “keep your servant from willful sins; may they not rule over me.” David isn’t just asking “help me to do the right thing because I don’t want to get punished.” I’m sure that’s in mind somewhere, but when I read this I begin to feel what David was feeling: a desire to be blameless before God, because he wanted to be closer to God.

“May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight.”

What’s he asking here? “God, you mean more to me than anything, can I mean the same to you?” And the answer is yes. Yes you can. When we are confronted with the indescribable awesomeness of God there is only one appropriate response, and that is to fall on our faces and beg Him not to step on us. He deserves our fear and reverence and every song we sing and every last cent in our bank accounts and every last scrap of our clothing and every bit of our strength and every last drop of our blood.

But that's not what God asks of us.

But His desire for us is that our desire would be for him. “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, me Rock and Redeemer.”
Do you feel anything when you read these words? Does your relationship with God move you to become greater than you thought you could be? Are we growing to allow God to speak not to our minds, but above all to our hearts?

I once heard a wise man say “You are as close to God as you want to be.”

The Steps of the Temple

2010-01-27T14:43:00.000-08:00

You are living in Israel around 1000 years before Jesus of Nazareth was born into this world. You are a pilgrim, making your way to the holy city of Jerusalem – as every good Jew would do at least once in their lives. You have been traveling, on foot, for many days – weeks in fact. You have brought you family with you, and the children slowed you down, let alone the animals you brought with you to bear your blankets and other belongings. But finally, you have arrived. You have made your way up the mountain of Zion, and into the very heart of God’s nation.
You are tired, and your feet ache fearsomely, but you do not delay. You make a quick stop by a well. Your wife draws some water while you get the kids together. You bring out the good robes to wear, while the missus washes their faces. You dress ‘em up with she combs hairs. You remind the family that this is an important occasion – a very special event. We never know when we might get the chance to come to the Great Temple again. We must be on our best behaviour. We must hold the utmost respect.
We must be holy people.
You draw near the end of your pilgrimage. The temple is in sight, and your sacrifices and offerings are ready in your hands. A line of lambs to be sacrificed by the priests; a pair of doves; the cakes of flour and oil. You spent almost as much time preparing these offerings as you did in traveling to the temple. But the time is almost here. You pass the court of the Gentiles, thankful that you are not one of these outcast people. You are chosen, and have greater access to YHWH. After the court of the Gentiles you climb the steps to the courts of the Jewish people, offering in hand.
And you hear the voice of the priest, speaking to you, pilgrim, and demanding to know:

“Lord, who may dwell in you sanctuary? Who may live on your holy hill?”

Do you continue forward? Or does his question give you pause?

Who may dwell in His sanctuary? Who may live on His holy hill? You? Your family? Anyone you know? We are the people of God. We bear his name and we are chosen. Surely, if anyone, we can dwell in those holy places. After all, you are…a good person.

That thought brings a fair amount of comfort, doesn’t it? I am a good person. I should be, after all, I am one of God’s children. I am a part of His kingdom. When the doubts of this life, and the unnerving question of worthiness comes up, we can settle our hearts with the comfort of those five words. I am a good person. And so, confident in your worth and place among His chosen, you resume your steps toward the doors of the temple. But the priest has not finished with you.

“He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks truth from his heart, and has no slander on his tongue…”

That does make you pause. You’re not certain you were expecting the priest to actually have an answer ready. And what an answer. You were certain that you could stride into the temple and present your offering with pride – not boastful, selfish pride; but the pride of achievement – the pride of having done well for your God.
But blameless? What does he mean? Does he mean that I have to be blameless to come before God? If so then…well…maybe he meant that I do not blame other people things. In that case…uh…
His walk is blameless. Well, you have a pretty fair walk, right? In fact, if you had to describe the way your feet carry you from one place to another, you’d probably choose the word ‘blameless’. Wouldn’t you? Uh, what else did he say? Righteous. Do what is righteous. Well, that’s easy right? I mean, if God is righteous, and you’re one of God’s people – I mean, you bear his name – then what you do must be righteous. Right?

Well, look, basically, you’re a good person. What else did he say? Speak truth from the heart; have no slander on the tongue. Well…there’s no slander on your tongue right now. You wouldn’t call yourself a liar – honestly. You are a truthful person…generally. Ok so maybe there’s a little white lie now and then, usually to protect someone from getting hurt, and sometimes you don’t tell the whole truth because you don’t want to risk offending people. And when you bad mouth someone, well, everyone needs to vent once in a while. It’s not really lies or slander, it’s just…
Look, you know it, you’re a good person.

This pilgrimage has not gone exactly as you planned. You’ve had a spot of uncertainty, but you’ve been made to examine yourself before coming to God. And that’s always a good thing. Now, without boasting, you can bring your offerings to the Lord.

You take a step.

“…who does his neighbour no wrong and casts no slur on his fellow man, who despises a vile man but honors those who fear the Lord…”

Ah. Do you even know your neighbour? No! Wait, I mean, yes! You had a BBQ! That’s good, right? How can you do someone wrong when you have ‘em over for a BBQ? Sure, you hardly talk at all, but that’s just what life’s like. If your neighbour had a genuine problem, like that time when their donkey broke down, and they had to get the boys to Hebrew school, and they had deliveries to make, and they knocked on your door with a panic, and you let them borrow a pen to write down the number of a good donkey repair guy? Well, it would be a bit much to let them borrow your donkey. I mean, you don’t know them that well. But you’d do right by them. As for slurs, well, I’m sure you don’t bad mouth them any more than they’d bad mouth you, right? That’s what being neighbours is about. Isn’t it? Aren’t we all, basically, good people?
“Despising a vile man”; now that’s something you can get into. That, I don’t think any of us have a problem with. You just show me a vile man and I’ll despise him good and proper. We can criticize him to others at the temple. We’ll shake our heads and tut at the mention of his name. We won’t actually talk to him at all, or have anything to do with him in any way. If he wants to be vile, that’s his business. He’s made his choice. We can be very comfortable criticizing from a distance. Just like good people do.
But “honor those who fear the Lord”? Well, what does that mean? You like the people you go to temple with; well, most of them…most of the time. They’re ok. Is the priest talking about himself? Cause we don’t really go in for all the high and mighty, holier than thou attitude of the clergy. It’s great that they do their job and that they can serve our spiritual needs, but let’s not let them get big heads or anything. They’re not really doing anything that important. Or those people who just won’t shut up about God. Those people who find ways to bring God into every aspect of their lives. I mean, give it a rest for once. They’re like teachers pets. Yeah, it’s really nice that they’re so enthusiastic, just like the priests and all, and we’ll honor them…in appropriate ways, and at appropriate times. Myself? I just don’t like being reminded constantly how little I really think about God-

…oh.

You look up at the priest, only this time you don’t take a step. You know he’s not finished.
“Who keeps his oath even when it hurts, who lends money without usury and does not accept a bribe against an innocent.”
Uh…

I think the point has been made. We have traveled miles and miles, carried the burden of livestock and coin, in order to present them and be declared righteous. But if that’s the entirety of our spiritual commitment, then God doesn’t want what we have to offer.
It’s not who we are on the moment we stand on the steps of the temple, it’s who we are on the journey home, when we wake up in the morning, when we shop for food, when someone cuts us off in traffic.

And he doesn’t want us to give him stuff that we can spare to show Him that we’re genuine. He doesn’t even want us to give Him stuff that we can’t spare, to show Him that we’re generous and selfless.

He wants us…

To live a life for justice…

To love the practice of mercy…

To walk humbly with Him, all our days.

“He who does these things will never be shaken.”
You’re frozen on the steps of the temple, the outsiders to your back, watching you with envy because they think you can approach God and they can’t. As you glance from side to side, you see others. The chosen; the believers; the devout – you…and me, unmoving on those steps to the temple. Are we sure we can approach God with confidence?

Of course we can. Because Jesus has opened up that way for us, hasn’t he? And we don’t need to do a thing to earn that grace, do we? It’s not about obeying the rules to get into heaven, it’s about embracing the life that Jesus offers us.
But here we are with our offerings – our sacrifices. The things we a willing to give over to God, and then forget about as we journey back home. Too often we lay these before God, and assume that our generosity is admired. Too often we check the boxes of the dutiful Christian: church on Sunday, attend the fetes and charity drives, vestry meetings. But really, what is the measure of our obedience? What is the measure of the change? What is the measure of our commitment to live as we are called to live?

We’re standing on the steps of the temple. Do we dwell in the presence of God?

Needless neediness

2009-11-10T16:32:00.000-08:00

When people I know are hurting, I get miserable.

It doesn't matter how awesome my day may have been, what's going on in my life at the time - if I get the news that someone I know is suffering in some way I instantly hit the wall. I have trouble sleeping. I can't focus on other things. I can't relax and enjoy quiet time. I know that pastor's are supposed to have this problem - that we have hearts so big and soft that we cannot help but to adopt the pain of others as our own; as if, in some way, it will make their situation more bearable. I mean, that's what the bible says, right? Share our burdens.

Though honestly, I think I often just feel guilty that I'm doing ok, when they're not.

This is where things get messed up, because all this happens in about the first five to ten minutes after hearing bad news. After this point, my first task is to find something that will distract me from thinking about it any more. Then, after I've been distracted for a little while, I look for some kind of entertainment that will make me feel better (World of Warcraft, Better of Ted, Family Guy). After this point, I start to work out how to avoid the person who's going through the proverbial, so that I don't have to be reminded that they're not doing well, and I don't start to feel bad again.

So...when people I know are hurting, I get miserable, and try to avoid them.

Damn. That's messed up. That's DOUBLE messed up. What the hell is wrong with me?

Of course, in thinking of avoiding my friends in need, I feel the crushing weight of guilt, and so I decide that I do need to spend some time with them. Just enough so that they'll think that I care, but not enough that I actually have to care. So I'm spending time with friends in need, just so I won't feel guilty.

DAMN! I'm amazed people are friends with me at all.

Some guys reading this blog will resonate with what I'm saying. Some guys will recognise themselves in what I'm saying. Some of you recognise yourselves as the guys who I think of avoiding and things could conceivably be awkward between us now...

Why air all this out now? Not sure; not really. I guess I've been pondering some of what I read in the Bible, and I wonder where it fits into this world - and more so into my life. Particularly verses like Acts 4:32-35,

"All the believers were one in heart and mind. No-one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, but they shared everything they had.
With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and much grace was upon them all.
There were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned lands or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales
and put it at the apostles' feet, and it was distributed to anyone as he had need."

Can you imagine a world without need? These guys could.
Can you imagine living in a community without need? These guys did it.
Can you imagine knowing that when you're hurting, shattered and in need, you never need to worry, because you know that someone is going to take care of you?

I want that. I want that very much.

Can we do this?

"And heeere we...GO!"

2009-10-27T05:50:00.000-07:00

WE'VE GOT A HEARTBEAT!

After months of waiting, my license is in the mail; the money is a formality; I may actually get to do this whole youth pastor bit...providing Jesus doesn't return in the next week or two.

Those of you whom have followed me along this journey can breathe a little easier. It's been trying, but it is in sight - not and end, but a beginning. I feel pretty good. In fact, this has been a damn positive week. A damn positive month. This has been one damn positive year...dammit!

Okay, so after my penance for bad language (hey, I'm Anglican now. That is Catholic Lite, Awesome X), I have to calm down and acknowledge that the warm fuzzies of this moment will not last. Life is great right now, but soon enough something is gonna go...well, not my way. And when that happens I'm gonna crash hard, and get a bit miserable, and remember that things always do this and life generally sucks...dammit.

Good grief, I'm getting depressed already. This is ridiculous!

I think that, more and more, when I reach into my Wokabow bag for some encouragement (aaaaand that's an obscure one that I doubt any of you will remember...) I recover something that I should probably tattoo on my hand so it's never out of mind for me: "Cast your cares upon The Lord, and He will sustain you." (Ps. 55:22) This doesn't promise me an instant pick-me-up or mood-enhancer; this doesn't make my life instantly better; and y'know, it's not suggesting that there's ever a time when God does not sustain us. It simply reminds me that no matter where I walk, no matter how hard I fall, no matter what I forget, no matter who forgets me...

...take a moment...

...there is a constant in my life. In your life. His name is Jesus. And He has not - and will never - abandon us to circumstance. He will sustain us. That means he keeps our heart beating, our lungs breathing, our bellies full, our rest fulfilled, our muscles stretching and our minds functioning. I can't rely on life, but I can rely on Him.

And that makes me feel better.

...sigh...

2009-10-18T16:20:00.000-07:00

Someday's I just don't got it.

I get to my computer and open up my blog and sit with my finger poised above the keys, all prepared to share my great adventures with the world and...nothing.
I wake up and am about to face a day full of meetings people and fellowshipping and encountering God alone knows what...and I'm just not excited.
Getting ready to start the dream job - the one I've been waiting for for eight years. Mneh.
Having the opportunity to be creative without restraint. Maybe later.

This morning was a struggle to get out of bed. True, I have a sore throat and I slept poorly and I'm generally feeling like crap at the moment...but lazing around hasn't helped the matter any.

I find myself wondering where this general unmotivation comes from. Is it unique to our generation? Something that began only in the 20th century? Is it a symptom of a greater spiritual problem in the Western world? Does it come from being out of favor with God?

Or do I just need to eat more fruit and vegetables?

The psalms are replete with the lyrics of those who were depressed, feeling hopeless and weak.

"My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death assail me" (55:4);
"How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart?" (13:2); "For my days vanish like smoke; my bone burn like glowing embers.
My heart is blighted and withered like grass; I forget to eat my food.
Because of my loud groaning I am reduced to skin and bones." (102:3-5)

Apart from anything else the bible says, I find a strange comfort in knowing that it was written by people who felt...well, human.

Just like me; just like you.

I get to whinge to God. I get to complain. I can be honest and moan and groan and generally be miserable, and He'll listen. He'll allow me to go on and on and on and on...and He won't tune out. He won't smack me in back of the head for being a wuss. But He will remind me - as he is doing in the moment that I write this - he reminds me:

"Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you;
He will never let the righteous fall." (55:22)
"But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation." (13:5)
"But you, O Lord, sit enthroned forever;
your renown endures through all generations.
You will arise and have compassion on Zion,
for it is time to show favor to her" (102:12-13)

In case you're curious about that last bit, 'Zion' is The Kingdom. His kingdom. The one that we inhabit. "Show favor to Zion"...show favor to Your People.

I think today might not be such a bad day after all.

Shalom

Re-expectations

2009-10-04T18:10:00.000-07:00

I read Aaron Ralston's biography once. Well, it's not so much a biography, since it's not his life story - it's really one story from his life told in impossible, excruciating detail...and I mean that in a good way.
Ralston, for those of you playing at home, is the American adventurer who went mountain biking in Colorado, took a fall, got his arm pinned beneath a boulder at the bottom of a canyon for three days, and then cut said appendage off with his pocket knife. I wish to repeat the previous sentence for impact: HE CUT OFF HIS HAND WITH A FREAKIN' POCKET KNIFE! There are some things in life we do not get over...

Anyhoo, in his retelling of those three days (each moment of which he recalls with uncanny clarity) Ralston tells of how he came to the realisation that he was going to die. See, he'd made an attempt to sever his hand which had trapped him there, alone, cold and malnourished. The pain in simply attempting to break the skin was too much - he had already attempted to chip away the rock around his arm, and had thusly dulled the blade. He also knew that his saw device would never make it's way through the bones in his arm. He was trapped. He could not save himself. He would die.

I can't imagine the wave of emotion that would accompany that realisation. He can describe it as much as he likes - I simply cannot get into that headspace...and no, I do not want to. To know, not fear, that you will die in this place - that the ones you love will not get to say goodbye; that you will be leaving things unfinished; that the next time you go to sleep...

Ralston had a video camera in his gear, and where initially he had been making a sort of journal of the experience (no doubt to stop from going mental), he figured now it's time to say goodbye. He recorded personal messages for his friends, his family (in particular his mother) and said his sorry's, I love you's, and I'll always be with you's. This done, he switched the camera off, returned it to a safe pocket in his backpack, made himself as comfortable as he could, and waited for the end.

And waited.

And waited...and waited.

...and waited.

Still waiting.

Hmm...just...y'know, waiting to die here. Waaaaaaaiiiiiting.

...

...

Aw fer crying out loud!

This, I figure, is a real problem - living in expectation. We 'know' something's coming up, and it's something important. It's huge. In fact, it's so big, pretty much everything in life will change. It's all going to be made obsolete by this new huge. Better put everything on hold. Better pause the world...oh wait, can't do that. Well, pause life then. Hang on, it's coming. It's almost here. It's just. around. the corner...

I see it in my life. I see it in the lives of the people I care about. I see it in the world. I see it in The Bible. God comes to Abram and tells him "You'll have a son of your own. In fact, you will father a nation of people - numerous as the stars!" All the man had ever wanted was a son, so of course he responds to this pretty well: "YOU DA MAN, LORD! I am so with you on this! Bring it on! YEAH BABY! I swear on all my dead relatives - even the ones who aren't feeling so good - I am your man!" A promise from God. I figure we can start seeing some movement on this in a few days right? A week? Two at the most. Till then, guess I'll just wait.

...still waiting.

Here's where the stories kinda go their separate ways. Abram couldn't wait. He got so caught up on the expectation of a son - that life would really only begin when he had that son - that he wouldn't wait for God to fulfill His Word in His time. Abram had a son to his servant girl, and God responded by saying "Sorry, that's not the son I promised you. You and your wife'll have to wait even longer for him." Can you hear Abram's response? Is it something like "GHRUEARGH!!!!!"?

Ralston couldn't wait. With every passing moment he found himself more edgy, not more tired. As the minutes turned to hours he began to reconsider his situation - after all, he really had nothing else to think about. But rather than cling to the certainty he had so recently felt concerning his death - rather than drown in that expectation - he chose to give life another shot. Let life govern whatever time he may have left. And life said..."I reckon there's a way out of this."

I won't detail his escape. He does that to great effect in his book "Between a Rock and a Hard Place" (detail people. excruciating. unedited. detail).

The moral of these stories (if there even is one), is that expectation has the power to stop you cold. To stop you doing. To practically stop you living. Even if you don't know what the expectation is for (and I do know how that feels). The question becomes, do we choose to hinge everything on the 'huge' that's just around the corner. Maybe.

Or do we choose to work, play, create, eat, share, love, skip, dance, read, enjoy, bake, garden, build, roll, drive, perform, cry, praise, care, dream, collide, hurt, breathe, dance, fly, shine, flee, recover, bounce, write, discover, live...until these things are torn out of our hands.

The One's that matter

2009-09-27T20:15:00.000-07:00

So I'm stuck in a very strange kind of limbo right now: I have a job - a career even; I just can't actually start working yet. I once prayed that God would grant me patience (uh-oh), and as I got a little older and a little wiser...well, a little older, I realised that I needed to pray that got would bring me the opportunities to exercise patience. I also once prayed that God would make me humble (everyone in the group took a few steps back from me at that one). God has now introduced me to the Anglican Diocese of Melbourne. This surely does seem to be the season of answered prayers.

Thusly, I find myself reflecting on how I got here. Not simply the events of these past months, or even years, but the whole of the journey - from birth to...well, now. Not that I remember birth with much clarity, though I've had so much time on my hands I've been able to come up with a few entertaining scenarios. One of them involves an improvised game of touch footy in the delivery room. But none of this has anything to do with music.

Over these past couple of months I have felt connected to God in a very real way - something that I cannot adequately explain, and in fact would be reluctant to try, for fear that the attempt would diminish the beautiful mystery of those encounters (Ps. 139:5 & 6). It is through the lens of these encounters, however, that I have looked back on my life and begun to discover His Touch in many places. The place of His presence where our Spirit's have joined is eerily familiar; finally I begin to understand why.

It is the memory of traveling with the family at Christmas - listening to classic rock'n'roll tapes, The Beach Boys and that wonderful compilation tape of Johnny Standley, Bill Cosby, Alice's Restaurant and those Snoopy vs The Red Baron songs (trust me, the family is wiping a nostalgic tear from the eye right now). It's in tasting my sister's lasagna for the first time (and the next time, and the one after that). It's seeing "Aladdin" with Dad for the first time. It's when I first learned to play "Breakfast at Tiffany's" on the guitar. It's watching the first season of "Heroes". John Mayer's first album. Playing "Starcraft". State Youth Games. Listening to the second movement of Beethoven's seventh symphony.

Why do I recall these really trivial things with such a sense of emotion and beauty? Because these are the great stones that mark the places where I encountered the Holy Spirit. And to listen to these songs now, to taste those dishes, to revisit those places I now realise is how God shows me that He has walked my journey in every moment.
Y'know, most of these times aren't of much significance in and of themselves. They should be so mundane - and hey, they may be to some others. But these are the places, and these are the songs, and these are the days and hours and minutes ad seconds where Jesus chose to press His finger into my heart and leave a mark. Why? Because He loves me. Maybe just so when I have months of spare time on my hands, and I begin to reflect on my life, I will be crushed with the moments of life and beauty which He has made into something even greater.

Do me a favor? When you're done here, go and put on your favorite album (or play list...or film, show, recipe...). I'm hoping that God has marked that one just for you as well.

See ya.

too much to think about

2009-09-21T06:50:00.000-07:00

I've learned a few things in the last two weeks. Please...allow me to share:

*No matter what 'they' may tell you, everybody loves surprises.

*I cannot eat my bodyweight in Pizza Shapes.

*Bureacucracy is gone mad everywhere...but The Church does it best.

*At finals time, everyone's a Footy fan...even if they don't have a clue as to what the big deal is.

*Monster Trucks are still irredeemably offensive to me.

*Talking about myself rarely gets boring.

*There really is no place like home...wherever that is...

*God is moving people into the places where they need to be.

*I love cruise control.

...and...

*I hate to fly.

*My youngest nephew, Michah, is one Chubbuh Bubbuh. And I miss him terribly...along with his brother, Aiden. And their cousins...and the respectives Mum's and Dad's...and my Mum and Dad...

*No mater how many times God comes through for me, I'm not learning.

...but...

*To seek His presence is such a sweet, sweet thing.

*To think for a moment that His promises may come true is like discovering I can get to Narnia through my wardrobe...or fly the Millenium Falcon.

*Healesville - one huckuva nice place to live.

To all of you who follow along this journey with me, thanks. Whether you've realised this or not, it does me much good to know that you guys aren't really that far behind me.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've decided I'm going to live tomorow...

...and so I will die today.

Lindsay...somewhere near Cair Paravel...

Thinking in Spirals & God Takes a While

2009-08-30T21:20:00.000-07:00

One of my lecturer's at college used to harp on about the difference between Western and Eastern thought. "In the West" he would say, "we think, and build ideas, the same way we build a wall. One idea lays alongside another and forms the base for a second layer of ideas which build up and up-" I'm sure you get it. "In the East however, they think and build ideas like a spiral. One idea leads to another idea which leads to an other which incorporates and advances the ideas that preceded it. So you keep going over the same core idea over and over, stretching it a little each time."

"The benefit to this kind of thinking is that if you prove wrong one idea, the whole structure won't come crashing down."

Last week I quoted Jeremiah, and did so in what has become a classic way to read that passage. I'd like to expand that idea a little now:
(8)"Yes, this is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says: 'Do not let the prophets and diviners among you deceive you. Do not listen to the dreams you encourage them to have (!). They are prophesying lies to you in my name. I have not sent them' (again...!) declares the Lord." And jumping over the verses I threw in here last week to verse 12 "'Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all of your heart. I will be found by you,' declares the Lord..."

Meet God. This is the God of promises and the God of deliverance. This is God, who says: "I don't want you getting caught up in your plans, or your dreams or anything this world says you can have or achieve...because none of it is good enough! I know the plans I have for you...and they are so good. And the only way you're gonna find them out is by getting close to me."

So I've spent about a week asking God for answers about life; about work; about dreams; about meaning, purpose and all that jazz. And do you know what he said to me? Absolutely nothing. God seemed (for what must be His own interminable reasons) reluctant to show me much of the road ahead. Uncomfortably silent. Frustratingly un-talkative.

In a moment of next-to-sheer panic I cried out "GOD! I NEED YOU! AAARRRGGGHHH!" ...well...maybe not with the dramatic "Argh!" But you get the idea. And amazingly, finally, and without hesitation, God turned up and said "Ah...now that's something I can work with."

I will leave you all to draw whatever conclusions you will from this exchange. The impact on me has been undeniable.

So yeah, I took the job.

Peace out y'all.

Unexpectations

2009-08-25T18:57:00.000-07:00

Well that was...not quite what I expected.

To get everyone on the same page: I had an interview this week at a church in Country Town, VIC. It wasn't far from the city, but you can't see one from the other. Anyhoo, this was for the role of youth pastor, and I thought this was a total God-send. "Yes!" I cried in victory "After this historic relocation to Melbourne, God has paved new paths for me! Life is good!"
I kinda got my hopes up about the whole thing. Not that that's a bad thing; I mean, it's good to dream, right? But I kinda hung my future on getting this job.

So, the interview...

It went well. Really well. Rev. Cleese was friendly and invited me around for dinner with the family (or tribe...there were a lot of them), and then the church Deciders talked with me and they were great and conversations were had, and Country Town is a little slice of heaven and da de da de da...

So I wasn't thrilled.

It's not that I didn't like what I saw. Everything was really great and it would be a fantastic opportunity to build a youth ministry from scratch. And Rev. Cleese is a guy I could see myself getting along with, and the church seems to be populated by good folk. And I will preface all the rest by saying that I haven't ruled anything out yet.
But something wasn't sitting right as I drove home in the dark (and once I remembered to turn my headlights on, I realised it was more than that). I discovered that if they called me, and told me that they were going to go with someone else...I'd be just fine with that. In fact, the more I thought about it, the more reasons came to mind as to why I didn't want to get the job. And I think it boils down to this:

I came to Melbourne to pursue a dream. This role - the interview and the hypotheticals placing me in said role - felt as though I would have to choose between This and The Dream. And I'm not sure I'm willing to go there.

Since last night I've had this scripture going over and over in my head (along with a song called "Cruel cruel moon" by Storm and Paul. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHbXprLHE6A) - this one's for the Pentecostals in the house: "For I know the plans I have for you" declares The Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

I don't really buy into prosperity doctrine - as this verse is sometimes used to admonish - but I do believe that God is faithful, and that He guides, and that He has good things in store for us. Forget about "prosper" for a moment, I'm content to settle on "no to harm you". And I believe it...I believe it. The problem for me comes when I'm faced with the fork in the road and I'm trying to figure out if one of these paths leads to "not to harm" or...not.

Watch this space...

All My Pwn

2009-08-16T20:09:00.000-07:00

Let me tell you about monster trucks.

Last weekend I helped The Wizard at a show in Melbourne...a monster truck show (for those of you having trouble following). While I was not directly involved with the trucks or the drivers or anything, I got all the up-close-and-personal I needed with the things. They are (in no particular order of severity) unforgivably loud, rancid smelling (about 10 seconds after ignition), environmentally antagonistic (not simply 'unfriendly') and, of course, they look utterly ridiculous. Make no mistake people...I hate the damn things. A friend in Sydney, El Firo (don't worry, he knows who he is), once told me that he planned to get hisself a Humvee. "Oh, for the love of God, why man?" His reply? "I just want to drive the most offensive vehicle I can." El Firo, if you're reading this, forget about the Hummer; get yourself into "Outback Thunder" (...what stupid freakin' names). (I have been corrected by Awesome X, that the name of the truck is in fact "Outback Thunda", making this whole operation that much more ridiculous. Zee)

What, you may ask, was I doing at the show?
Well, The Wizard's job was to put on a laser show at the intermissions, and I helped him carry five smoke machines (20kg each), three boxes of cables (10-15kg each) and a laser (...approx. 450kg) to the upper reaches of the Ron Laver arena (think Acer, Sydney people. Everyone else, think...whatever...); set 'em all up; connect 'em; make sure they work; pack 'em up at the end; carry 'em all back downstairs.
Ok, some truth. A cherry picker was available to get everything up into the roof of the arena (thank God), and the laser did have wheels. We did, however, have to carry everything down ourselves, and I will tell you that climbing down a ladder with a 20kg smoke machine balancing on your shoulder...FIVE TIMES...is not exactly a picnic.

All this to say...I had a great weekend.

I was a little perplexed by it all at first. I mean, I wouldn't call any of the stuff we did 'fun'. So what was it that made me feel so good? Without getting into it too much, it wasn't the people. Monster truck carnies (for that's what they are, folks) are not the friendliest bunch. And I didn't come to Melbourne to help out with light shows, or to be a labourer. This, friends, is not the dream.

Why was it all so good for me?

On Saturday I had the good fortune to be at a church to hear a message from Erwin The Barbarian (...oh come on! That's an easy one!). His message gave me a great perspective, and I'd like to share my version of that with you now:

I don't think we belong to ourselves.

Along with a number of other influential speakers at the moment, The Barbarian's currently focused on encouraging people to Dream. Dream your life and Dream the future, and pursue those Dreams. This is what God built us for; the why we were created the way each of us was created.
But something that I had not considered before was this: that Dreams should be that which makes this whole world a better place. Not just the dream of owning a Ferrari, or the dream of working for yourself, or the dream of one day being abducted be aliens (hey...some people). No, we're talking about that which God placed in your life (heart, mind, soul - take your pick) that when pursued, enriches not just yourself but everyone around you.

In Jesus' words "The greatest among you, will be your servant" (Matt. 23:11). He once said "If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles" (5:41). It is a strand that He picks up over and over in the gospels - Be a servant of All, that's what you were made for.

Of course, some may see this as exploitative. If we were to go around being all 'servanty' then all we'd get is just people constantly taking advantage of us. Well, that may be true. But remember the Dreams - the real ones. Dreams shape the future and Dreams make us make the world a better place. If everyone pursued their God-given Dreams, then we'd all be serving each other, and I think that's pretty sweet! "But that's not how the world works" says the cynic. "You've got to take care of yourself first."

Sorry, but if I don't live out my Dream of a better world - not just for me, but for everyone - then we'll never see it. That's why when The Wizard asks for my help again, I'll gladly go and do whatever needs doing. Because that's part of my Dream.

Dream big people...but not just for yourselves.

(p.s. I'd like to apologise to any monster truck enthusiasts who may have found my earlier comments a bit upsetting. In no way did I...well...ok I meant every word. But hey, different strokes and different Dreams right? Now, if your dreams of monster trucks can make this world a better place...)

Time Enough

2009-08-09T18:35:00.000-07:00

God finally got me up off my butt last week. Blew out my wireless network device.

Biggest favor He could have done for me.

I have wasted so much time over the past seven weeks just sitting in front of my computer and scouring the Net, almost at random. Do you want to know where to find the best and cheapest T-shirts online? How many acapella groups are posting vids on youtube? What a 'tv trope' is and how many there are? Well, I can tell ya!

(incidentally that's www.6DollarShirts.com, 47 at last count, and I can't tell you how many entries there are on tvtropes.org...only that I have read every last one!)

There's surely a time and place to enjoy these pointless little gems. A time to space out and do absolutely nothing (or, at least nothing that matters). But when I'd rather watch the Bollywood rip off of Michael Jackson's Thriller than do some writing, or banking, or laundry...well, something has to change. I'd even pass off spending time with God in the mornings; and that, friends, would be the real tragedy.

The times when I grow close to God...no, I can say that better. When I bother to spend time with God (yeah, that's more like it), it is always, always good time. I feel more alive; better about myself and the world; ready to face down all my troubles. He. Completes. Me. (thanks Jerry).

I know all this, and yet I still constantly find other things to do - and then I wonder why I feel like crap all the time, and why things seem to be such a struggle. I pray for God to give me a sign, a dream, a word, a breakthrough...just...something. Anything!

Well, now He's taken away my only other option, I've got quite a lot of time to spend with Him. I think the next couple of weeks could really be something.

"I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things" Phil. 3:8

Your Film...or Something Like it...

2009-07-27T04:53:00.000-07:00

Checking in at Melbourne + 5 weeks...and there has been producement. Productivising? Producings...?
...it was a good weekend.

It's the kind of weekend where something was achieved. Y'see, I edited a movie. Well, to be more precise, I led the team that edited a movie. Or, at least me and my mate, uh...'Awesome X' - we edited a movie. That is I helped...sort of. I was there. Awesome X did most of the actual work. Well...pretty much all of the work...

...I punched up youtube videos all weekend.

But I did bring the filmmaker and Awesome X together. The filmmaker - a friend from Sydney (lessee...'Buttercup') - is entering this years Ignite film festival. That's the Christian short film festival, in case you didn't know (yeah, like you wouldn't know that...mmm...). Together, they actually made quite an impressive team. Buttercup shot the whole thing in two days, got the footage to us before the end of the week, and Awesome X chopped it before she flew back on Sunday. And it's due this Friday! That's productivity right there.

I did feel kinda useless most of the time. In fact, all of the time. It was kinda like being at a party, and a friend introduces you to their friend, but then leaves before the conversation really starts, and then after you've introduced yourselves you find that neither of you has any interest in what the other person does with their time, and so you're just standing there trying not to make eye contact and nodding. A lot.

It felt as though I were a supporting character in my own life at that moment (and I can hear that chorus of cheers from people who've had that exact thought for themselves). It was like, 'this is my life...and it's not about me!' But then that's right, isn't it? It's not about me.

One verse stands out in my mind right now: "All the believers were together, and had everything in common" (Acts 2:44). My life, as a follower of Christ, does not revolve around me, it revolves around The Lord. And I do not exist like this on my own, but rather alongside every other follower of Christ. Where they triumph, I triumph. Where I am downcast, they share in my sorrow. Where God is glorified, we are all lifted up. Being in the presence of all this movie making - of which I could take no credit, play no part and enjoy no kudos - I realise that if I can bring my eyes to look at more than myself and what I want, then I might see more what others around me need. And that, I think, would make me a whole lot happier.

Or at least a whole lot busier.

For those interested, keep an eye on the Ignite Film Festival for a film titled "Same, but Different". For the rest of you...well, get interested. Live for the kingdom people.

Peace out.

How quickly they forget...wait...what was I saying?

2009-07-20T06:04:00.000-07:00

Was reading Exodus this morning and really hooked into those passages (16:2 & 3) where the people of Israel, having just been freed from slavery and oppression in Egypt, begin to grumble about how they don't have food and how their feet hurt and how some of them have to share chapsticks (...well, they might've. Do you know?) And the old thought came to my mind, 'Far out! Those guys suck! After all that God has done for them they should know better than to whine about it.

I'd know better.'

Hmmm...

That thought passed quickly, since I realised that I do that all the time. Even worse, I don't learn from one instance to the next. God gives me a car, pretty soon I'm complaining and worrying about how to pay for rego. God gives me a job, I'm complaining about the hours and lousy pay. God gets me to Melbourne with financial support to spare...I start whining about how I'm on my own and beyond my means and don't have a job and I don't know if I'll make it...

Jesus once said "...do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:34) Man, what if He meant it?

What if He meant that I didn't have to worry about a job? Since He got me this far, He's not gonna walk out on me now.
What if He meant I don't have to worry about finding a place to live? I mean, when was the last time I was out on the street?
What if He meant I don't have to worry about church? His kingdom advances regardless of wherever I go to worship.
What if He meant I don't need to worry about that conversation that I know is going to end in frustration and potentially damage a good friendship and ruin my life as I know it? C'mon...when has that ever happened?

For those of us who call ourselves followers of Jesus, well...

...well what if He actually meant it?

Everywhere...

2009-07-13T06:21:00.000-07:00

Just scraping in before the deadline with this post. Won't keep y'all long...

I was thinking today about how little things change - and by that I mean the things that we want to change. I travel 900kms to make a new home, start forging new relationships with people; I've been here for three weeks now...I think I was expecting more of a dramatic shift in lifestyle or something. But I have worked out the issue.

Everywhere I go...there I am.

Whatever else I can change about my circumstances - job, home, car, hobbies, friends, church - I remain irrevocably myself. I only change so much. And slowly, I might add. The change in geography did not shake up my life quite as violently as I may have taken for granted. No, those changes are much harder in the coming.

But should I feel downcast about my innate...me-ness? When the adventure is over after just a few hours, and I'm left being the same dude that started the journey, well, isn't that a bit depressing? Hell yeah. But you know what it is that makes it depressing? I know the kind of man I want to be. Getting there...

Y'see, I'm pretty at home with the fact that I can't get too worked up about my circumstances in life, 'cause they can change on a whim. My whim, or a boss's whim, or God's whim. Heck, anyone could conceivably show up at any moment and turn things upside down for me (that is not an invitation). The only thing I can do that matters is make myself the best that I can be. And yet - in every place, every time, every moment - I am so frustratingly familiar.

I read in Romans 6:6 that I've been crucified, and am no longer a slave to sin. Well, it don't feel like it. I hear the whole "...be transformed by the renewing of your mind..." thing rolling around in my head, and I just. don't. change. I feel wretched...a disappointment of a man.

But here I also read "...there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of The Spirit set me free from the law of sin and death." (8:1 & 2)

Seems God's made up his mind to cut me some slack; not abandon me to selfishness...or arrogance...or envy...or laziness...or...depression...

...but to set me free from it all.

I wonder if I can live in that circumstance?

Lightning Bolts at El Bethel - Part the Second

2009-07-05T23:31:00.000-07:00

Welcome back, if indeed you are back. If you're here for the first time, then simply "welcome!" You haven't missed much.

So if you had packed up your entire life, said goodbye to everyone you knew and were ready to move all to another state, only to have all your finances blown out from underneath you at the eleventh freakin' hour, what would you do?

Talking with my parents about that the other week, I had to acknowledge that I had only two workable options, neither of which appealed to me: 1) Ask for the money from Mum and Dad; 2) Stay in Sydney for another few months and save up - try again.
Now I'm not an overly proud man - The Lord knows that I've needed Mum and Dad to help bail me out of tight spots before. That doesn't mean I'm happy about it. And this was a different matter - this was asking for a heap of support, with no prospects of work for me and so no guarantee of being able to pay back later on.
"So what's so bad about staying in Sydney for a little longer? Work that bank account back into shape." Well, I shall tell you. For one thing, I'd just said goodbye to everyone...literally everyone. I'd feel a little stupid walking back into work/church next week with a grin while everybody asks "What are you doing here?" Secondly, working casually at a video store is not the fast track to the big bucks people. I know the lifestyle of a video store clerk seems glamorous, but lemme tell ya...
Point being, if I stayed to work, I didn't know if I'd ever get the chance to go again.

At this point I feel I should share the other crisis going on in my head at this time. I had poured so much emotion and passion into the move, and into the prospect of working on film stiuff with Al, and into serving in ministry in Melbourne, that to have it taken away didn't just suck...I had to wonder if God was doing this on purpose. Let's face it, the timing was sus, people. I thought, all this time, that God was at least allowing me to pursue these new opportunities, and even opening the doors for me. Now...(*hurm*)...

My parents, my Wise Man from Melbourne, and others whom I spoke with over those days all shared with me that piece of frustration - the Thorn of Not-Knowing. Speaking with Dad, when we laid out my very own "Five Unthinkable Options", he quietly encouraged me not to rush to a decision. Give it some time. After all, nothings going to change over the next few days - the options will still be exactly the same.

Well, unless God throws lightning my way.

Bear in mind at this point, not even 24 hours have passed since first the proverbial hit the proverbial. I've gone from intensely angry, to desolately hopeless, to utterly depressed, to resignedly calm, to faithful acceptance, to tentatively hopeful, to unexpectant resignation. And I'm sick to boot. Got the flu. Bleh.

So I'm in bed early, trying to sleep and not feel like...bad. I hear the phone ring. My Mother answers. I hear the words "Oh, yes he is. Just let me get him." The door opens, and I am handed the phone.

For the purposes of this blog, let us refer to the caller as Keyser Soze.

Keyser and I speak for a little while, then I quietly get up, return the phone to my Mother, turn to my Dad and say: "...I just got struck by lightning."

Keyser is close to my family, but not always 'in the loop'. To their thinking, I was already in melbourne and they had called the folks to find out how to get in touch with me. See, God had put in on their heart a short time back that they needed to give away some money. And they thought they should give it to me. They were not previously aware of the events that had unfolded this week. They just...called...y'know...

I'm not going to add much more to this point other than...This Is Our God people.

And so, I am now in Melbourne - and I rest easy here for the moment; not just because I recieved a miraculous blessing at T plus 24 hrs; and not just because my parents decided to add to that blessing with their own (a fact I am unbearably grateful for).
See this gift gave me something even more valuable than finance. I got Word from God that it was time to GO. I don't think I need to tell people how rare these moments are in life - when God shows up to push us out the door.

Keyser Soze, if you're reading this, you have given me more than you know; God has worked through you, for my sake, in a wonderful way...and I will never stop being grateful for that.

I leave you now with a thought not my own, but given to me by Wise Man in Melbourne. After this whole crazy day had settled, he simply directed me to a verse in Genesis 35:6, 7 & 15. When the Israelites encountered God at significant moments, they built a monument of stones to remind everyone that God was at this place.

Wise Man said to me: "This is your El Bethel, Lindsay."

If you'll excuse me, I've gotta find some big honkin' stones.

Shalom.

Never thought I'd miss breathing so much...

2009-06-29T03:35:00.000-07:00

Well, this officially marks my first week in Melbourne...and to those thinking 'Lindsay can't count', as with all things in life there are stories to tell...

So I'm all set to make a move of 900 km's distance from family, friends, church and the only city I can ever recall calling 'home'. My car's in the shop having some major work done (I'd put it in for a service...perhaps should've known better), but 'm assured that it'll be done by the day I leave...or the day after...or the day after that...or maybe...

Y'know what? Let's play this one by ear.

I'm still in reasonably good spirits at this point - cause I figure 'Well hey, better they catch these problems now than the car detonate halfway between here and Melbourne, right? And 'they' assured me that they would keep the cost of repairs below the amount I told them I had. What harm is there in postponing for a few days?' sigh.

All this time the head cold which I think is a brief annoyance gradually broadens it's scope to include sleep-deprivation. Still I'm thinking 'Hey, better I get this now than when I'm on the road or during my first week there. Maybe these couple of days delay have been a hidden blessing!' sigh.

Finally I receive a call from the friendly fellows at #*% Automotive services (...hey, I'm not vindictive here). "We're all done. You can come getcha car. The final cost is...several hundred dollars more than you have."
You may understand how this, somewhat, takes the wind out of my sails.
Mum and Dad tell me they'll put the repairs on their Card, and I settle in for a weeks worth of "Dammit!" and feeling sorry for myself.

Enter, stage left, a Good Man and Close Friend who gives me the gentlest, most loving and caring slap in the face I've ever had...via the handset of his phone. "Don't sit alone and stew," he says, "when you've got people you can talk about this with." Strangely, this advice is remarkably effective. Speaking with Dad, then Mum, then Dad & Mum, I see the problems before me for what they are (setbacks resolved by time) and for what they aren't (the end of the world as we know it). Suffering now from an assault of lovingly presented, sensible advice I will wait out the weekend, and leave all the unresolved....unresolved.

Y'see, at this point, I'm asking all the usual questions about why these things happen. Is God trying to tell me something? Is Satan trying to attack me? Is this just a random unfortunate turn of events? Is this...? or maybe...? it could be...? And the frustrating part is that the answer could be yes...or it could be no! I just don't know. I don't even know if I'm asking the right questions. But then this little gem pops into my head, and I offer it to you, since it wasn't my idea in the first place and to horde it just seems unseemly and rude.

If I did have the answers to ANY of the questions rattling around in there...would it at all change the reality I'm living?

Answer: No.

I think God's that much more interested in the NOW. I think He wants me to be that much more interested as well. Am I going to move to Melbourne next week? What if there is NO next week? Am I capable of changing either of these possibilities? No. So let Me handle the plans, Lindsay. I'm God and I know what's going on, and you know what? It's all good. For now, concern yourself with what you are doing right now. You've been given some time - or had some forced on you; in any case, isn't it a good idea, right now, to think about who you will spend that time with?

Maybe we should stop trying to fill up our days and hours and minutes with plans and preparations and troubleshooting and problem solving...and just try to fill up our days with more of The Father. Maybe we should stop turning to every single person we know, asking "What do you think I should do?"...and turn to The Son. Maybe we should ignore our present reality - troubles and all - for a while...and pay attention to The Spirit.

'They' say (and why would 'they' lie), "When life hands you a lemon...make lemonade." Great. I don't know how to make lemonade. "Uh, ok...well then, grab an orange and an apple and learn to juggle." No good. Got zero coordination. "Well then...we're all out of ideas."
Well here's one that makes sense: When life hands you a lemon, you do the only thing worth doing with a lemon...cut it in two and squeeze it over a hot, think pancake with HEAPS of sugar.
Then sit...and enjoy God's company while you eat.

Isiah 30:15-18

Catch y'all next week.
Lindz.

It Aint Easy

2009-04-22T16:19:00.000-07:00